Babysitter Tips: Dealing with Upset Children

As a babysitter, there may be times when you need to deal with an upset or distressed child.  It is important to fill your metaphorical childcare toolbox before babysitting in order to be able to deal with these situations in the most effective and compassionate way.

Of course, the best plan of action is prevention, rather than cure.  Laying the groundwork will help the child feel secure with you as their babysitter when the time inevitably comes that the parents have to leave.

Preparation

Following are some tips and ideas for helping children feel secure in your care.

 

  • Visit and meet the child at least once, preferably several times, before the time comes that you’ll be needed to babysit.  Getting to know you a little first will be key in the child being happier to have you look after them.
  • When you meet the child, make sure you spend some time getting down to their level and playing with them.  Ask them questions to help them feel as though they are important to you.
  • Make some plans with them in advance, if they are old enough to understand.  You might try asking them what their favourite game is, and ask them if you can play it together when you look after them.  You could also tell them that you’ll bring some home-made play dough with you to play with – it’s easy to make and costs practically nothing, and most kids get very excited about it.  However, if you make promises, make sure you keep them!
  • Take a small soft toy with you and give it to the child, asking them to take care of it until you see them next when you can play with it together.  This will help the child feel connected to you and look forward to your return.

 

 

When the parents leave

It is incredibly common for children of all ages to become upset when their parents leave.  They may melt down at the point of the separation, or they might become upset later on.  Either way, you will need to deal with this in a kind and understanding way.

  • Remember that this is a big deal to them.  Just because they are little doesn’t mean their feelings are any less important.
  • Tempting as it may be, don’t immediately try to distract them out of their sadness.  If a friend of yours was upset about something, you wouldn’t try to get them to think about something else – you’d listen.  There’s nothing wrong with making suggestions of things to do, but don’t try to ‘snap them out of it’.
  • Empathise with them.  Even very young children can understand when somebody is making an effort to understand how they feel.  Saying things like “You’re so sad because your mummy left and you wanted her to stay” and “I can hear how sad you are. I understand how you’re feeling right now” will help them feel as though their feelings are real, and important to you.
  • Reassure the child that their parent(s) will be home soon and that you promise you will keep them safe until then  .

NMW National Minimum Wage 2020/21

From April the NMW (National Minimum Wage) rates are changing for the 20/21 tax year.

As an employer you must comply with the national minimum wage, if you do not you could end up in an Employment Tribunal or be reported to HMRC and face a fine of up to £20,000.

The new hourly rates for the tax year 2020/21 are:

  • Apprentice   – £4.15
  • 16 to 17 year old   –  £4.55
  • 18 to 20 year old   –  £6.45
  • 21-24 year old   –  £8.20
  • 25+   –  £8.72

If nanny lives in the family home and not separate accommodation provided by the employer, then the national minimum wage does not apply.

For live in nannies, there is a daily accommodation offset rate of £8.20 per day, £57.40 a week. These rates are set every April, so it is important to keep up to date with the new legislation. These rates are from April 2020.

For accommodation provided to nanny other than the family home, this will need to be declared as a Benefit In Kind.

Zero-Hours contracts

‘Zero hours contract’ is a non-legal term used to describe many different types of casual agreements between an employer and an individual.

Generally speaking, a zero hours contract is one in which the employer does not guarantee the individual any hours of work. The employer offers the individual work when it arises, and the individual can either accept the work offered, or decide not to take up the offer of work on that occasion.

Regardless of how many hours are offered, the employer must pay at least the National Minimum Wage.

Everyone employed on a zero hours contract is entitled to statutory employment rights. There are no exceptions.

A person will benefit from the employment rights associated with their employment status and individuals on a zero hours contract will either have the employment status of a ’worker’ or an ‘employee’.

Any individual on a zero hours contract who is a ‘worker’ will be entitled to at least the National Minimum Wage, paid annual leave, rest breaks and protection from discrimination.

Discrimination

It is against the law to treat someone less favourably than someone else because of a personal characteristic such as religion, sex, gender reassignment or age.

Discrimination can include:

  • not hiring someone
  • selecting a particular person for redundancy
  • paying someone less than another worker without good reason

You can discriminate against someone even if you do not intend to. For example, you can discriminate indirectly by offering working conditions or rules that disadvantage one group of people more than another.

Discrimination in Job adverts

You must not state or imply in a job advert that you’ll discriminate against anyone. This includes saying that you are not able to cater for workers with a disability.

Only use phrases like ‘recent graduate’ or ‘highly experienced’ when these are actual requirements of the job. Otherwise you could discriminate against younger or older people who might not have had the opportunity to get qualifications.

Where you advertise might cause indirect discrimination – for example, advertising only in men’s magazines.

Bank Holidays

Bank Holidays 2020

2020 is upon us and it is always handy to have a list of the bank holidays for the year and what day of the week they fall on.

These are the dates of the bank holidays in 2020 for England.

1 January Wednesday New Year’s Day
10 April Friday Good Friday
13 April Monday Easter Monday
8 May Friday Early May Bank Holiday
25 May Monday Spring bank holiday
31 August Monday Summer bank holiday
25 December Friday Christmas Day
28 December Monday Boxing Day

 

If a bank holiday is on a weekend, a ‘substitute’ weekday becomes a bank holiday, normally the following Monday.

It is worth noting that if nanny does not work 5 days a week that she is still entitled to bank holidays on a pro rata basis, for example if nanny only works 3 days per week then she is still entitled to 3/5ths of the 8 bank holidays whether her working day falls on a bank holiday or not.

Blue Monday

Today is Blue Monday, supposedly one of the most depressing days of the year, based on the weather, debt, time since Christmas, lack of motivation and many other factors. Undoubtedly, we probably all feel a little low at this time of year for a whole host of reasons. But for those people that genuinely suffer with depression every single day Blue Monday is just another day to them.

Depression in adults is a condition we’re all familiar with. Most adults have at some point felt mildly depressed and a surprising proportion of the population has suffered from clinical depression, whether treated or not.  Although there is still a huge stigma around saying that someone as an individual is or has been depressed, it’s no longer the hidden condition it once was. Depression in children and teenagers, on the other hand, is much less widely acknowledged but potentially very serious.

What on earth do children have to be depressed about?

We may cast our minds back to the halcyon days of our own childhood and wonder what there is to become stressed and depressed about but firstly childhood was never that simple and secondly today’s children are facing an infinitely more complex world with shifting social norms, advancing technology and mounting media pressure. In Hollywood everyone is popular, rich and happy, the guy always gets the girl and we all live happily ever after. This can set up dangerous expectations for real life and if children can gorge on this constructed reality, they can end up feeling like they’ll never be good enough. If we’re honest with ourselves we were all anxious about school and schoolwork, keeping up with our friends and living up to parental expectations and today’s children are no different, even though the challenges they face are. It becomes more complicated when children become adolescents because the maelstrom of hormones, which leads to tears, tantrums, rage and rebellion, can mask depression – it all gets put down simply to being a teenager. It’s especially important at this time to watch out for anything out of the ordinary which continues over a lengthy period as it may point to a deeper issue.

How can I spot depression?

Knowing what is normal for your child or charge is key, and that can only be achieved by keeping the lines of communication open. It’s difficult when your efforts are met with angry rejection but keep letting them know you’re listening and do genuinely listen to what they say even if it seems insignificant to you. A constant refusal to communicate may be a sign that something is troubling them, but they don’t know how to talk to you about it. In this case be guided by your instincts and you may need to seek professional help along with your child. Although it may feel like a betrayal at the time, a child will get over that faster than untreated depression.

Surely my child is too young to be depressed.

 In fact, depression can hit children as young as 2 or 3 years old so there’s no such thing as too young. The number rises sharply in adolescence, with girls twice as likely to suffer as boys at this point. Rest assured, depression in very young children is likely to be the result of physical or emotional trauma and rarely manifests in healthy children with a secure attachment to their parents. Children who are at risk of depression, be it from chronic illness or emotional disturbances in their life, are likely to be offered additional help, perhaps in the form of play therapy or counselling.

That said, although depression in children is rare it’s important to remember that it does still exist and shouldn’t be discounted because of age.

How can I prevent depression?

There is no one way to prevent depression but setting an example of a healthy, realistic lifestyle is a good start. Plenty of exercise and fresh air along with a good diet will help keep the brain’s chemistry in balance and ensuring plenty of time for relaxation and play is vital for relieving stress. Good communication skills lay the foundation for open and honest exchanges about emotions and will safeguard your relationship throughout the difficult teenage years. It’s never too early to talk to children, be honest with them and accept them for who they are, encourage them to express their feelings and give age-appropriate explanations for what they see in the world around them.

Get into the habit of looking for the good in life. At the end of the day encourage children to focus on the good things that have happened and consider encouraging older children who don’t want to be tucked in any more to keep a positivity journal. The act of reflecting on what has gone well prevents a spiral of negativity and a journal can be a source of encouragement when times get tough.

For more information please visit www.youngminds.org.uk

Top 10 essential items every Nanny carries

Like every child is different, every Nanny and Manny are different, but the one thing they all have in common is that they are always prepared! Here are our top 10 essential items that every Nanny carries with them. What is your most essential item? Or What have we missed off our list?

  1. Mobile Phone with emergency contacts in – Mum, Dad, Grandparents, Neighbour, Doctor, Dentist, whoever is on your list make sure you have a plan of action if there is an emergency!
  2. Medical Information for each child. In the UK we have the Red Book which should contain all the vital info you need such as food allergies, medication, etc. But if you don’t have this then keep a note handy with all the details. If the child, you care for becomes ill the first questions you will be asked are ‘Is the child taking any medication’ ‘Does the child have any allergies’ Having this information to hand may save valuable time.
  3. First Aid Kit – You can buy a ready made one or simply carry the necessary items around with you such as Plasters, antiseptic wipes, safety pins, tweezers, gauze dressings, sterile eye dressings, crepe roll bandage, triangular bandage, disposable gloves.
  4. Tissues, wet wipes and hand sanitizer.
  5. Sunscreen and lip balm, even the most overcast days can require some protection from the sun, always better to be safe.
  6. Nappies (Or underwear if potty trained), Changing mat, wipes, cream disposable potty, – you never know when you might be caught out!
  7. Change of clothing, what child hasn’t rolled in the mud or been sick and needs to be changed.
  8. Healthy snacks – children are constantly hungry, ready prepared fruit, rice cakes, raisins, prepped veg and hummus. All great energy boosters if you have a flagging child.
  9. Bottled Water – Great for cleaning up a messy child or for a drink break through the day.
  10. Small toys and books, if you must queue, go on public transport of just keep a child occupied while you wait for something, having a toy or book handy will help deal with any boredom the child might feel.

What are the regulations if nanny is a student?

If nanny is a student, they will still be subject to paying Tax and NIC on their salaries like normal workers if they earn above their personal allowance, which for the current tax year (19/20) is £12,500.00 gross per annum (£1,041.67 gross per month).  If nanny’s earnings are below this threshold then they will not be subject to tax deductions on their salaries.

Nannies over the age of 16 will need to have Employee National Insurance deducted.

Nannies who are students and come from overseas will not be able to get a National Insurance refund if they return home, even if they work in the UK for a short period of time.

The only way a foreign student nanny could get exemption from National Insurance is to produce either an A1, E101 or E120 certificate from a European Economic Area (EEA)

If your student nanny leaves the UK to return to their native country during the tax year, they may be able to claim back some or all of the Tax which they may have paid on their salary in the UK.  They would need to complete and return a form ‘P85’ to HMRC, including parts 2 and 3 of their P45 from their current employment. If nanny, has worked in the UK for a full tax year, then they will not be able to claim back the Tax which they have paid on their earnings.

The P85 form can be obtained by contacting HMRC directly.

 

https://www.gov.uk/tax-right-retire-abroad-return-to-uk

Get into the Christmas spirit with our top 5 festive books for children

Christmas is the perfect time to rekindle your child’s love of books and reading.

Children’s Christmas books are filled with happiness, wonder and strong morals. Reading is a simple, easy activity that can be enjoyed by children of all ages, no matter the weather.

Encourage them to learn by reading aloud or helping them to read along.

What are you waiting for? Pick up a book today and spark their imagination.

See below for our recommended top 5 festive children’s books!

Continue reading “Get into the Christmas spirit with our top 5 festive books for children”

Nanny or Au Pair

Age and Cultural exchange programme

An au pair is between the ages of 18-30 and comes to the UK to learn or perfect her English in exchange for childcare.

A nanny can be any age and does not take part in a cultural exchange programme.

Wage and working hours

Au pairs can only work on average 30 hours a week and on top of their accommodation will normally get what is classed as ‘pocket money’. ‘Pocket money’ on average is £100.00 per week and as long as they earn less than £118.00 per week and have no other income this does not need to be declared to HMRC.

A nanny receives a wage in line with the national minimum wage.

Language courses

Au pairs must have the chance to attend a language course.

A nanny does not have to attend a language course.

Employee/family

An au pair is seen as a temporary family member.

A nanny is seen as an employee.

Legalities

An au pair needs a visa specific to an au pair.

Nannies who are coming from abroad need a work visa or permit. A nanny cannot work under an au pair visa.