Category: childcare

3 ways to better manage behaviour

Observe

Obviously we’re always watching children but simply watching is very different to keenly observing with an objective in mind. If you’re notice a pattern of negative behaviour make a special effort to observe and find the triggers. Sometimes the incidents seem random but there may be a bigger pattern behind it – common causes are unexpected tiredness, over-stimulation, teeth coming through. Sometimes it’s linked to something that we’re doing, albeit unintentionally. A child who doesn’t know what is expected of them will lash out when confused. This is particularly noticeable when children are growing in independence and learning new skills, but at the same time the mistakes they make are behaviours we don’t want to encourage. It’s difficult to learn to drink from an open cup without spilling once or twice.

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Why children act up for their parents

‘They never behave like this with me’. ‘The minute the mother walks in the door all hell breaks loose’. ‘The house is like a zoo when I get home’.

It’s a common complaint on both sides. Why do children act up when both nanny and parents are present? Here are 3 possible explanations:

They’re playing ‘power struggle’. Kids know that there’s a sense of hierarchy and they’re trying to navigate the complicated world of human relationships. When two people who are in charge of them are together, who is the one who has the ultimate power? The surest way for them to test this is to behave badly and see who tells them off, and whether the other person can over-rule any consequences.

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Child abuse – what is it and how do you recognise it

Every nanny and childcare professional should know what child abuse is and how to spot the signs. You will be probably be tested on this knowledge during an OFSTED inspection.

Child abuse is causing harm to a child, whether intentionally or unintentionally. There are four types of abuse: physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse and neglect.

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Students for summer childcare

Every year university students use their long summer break to earn a bit of extra cash to support them through their studies. Often young women, although some young men too, who like children see spending a summer as a nanny as the perfect solution. Students can be a great alaternative if you’re considering a summer au pair, but there pros and cons to weigh up.

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Settling in a temporary nanny

You might have a temporary nanny to cover a gap in childcare, to fill in for your usual nanny, or over a period like the school summer holidays. Whatever the reason you’re likely to be able to spend less time showing her the ropes and letting her bed in, and you need to be quicker to correct anything that looks like it’s going downhill.

Most temporary nannies are very flexible and adaptable people. Nannies who temp long term often choose to do so because they enjoy the variety temping brings and are happy to do things your way. They are experienced enough to get on with the job and quickly develop a good relationship with their new charges. They are also a dab hand at asking the right questions to get the information they need from you, which means you don’t have to tell them absolutely everything about your life in case it’s relevant.

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Breastfeeding and childcare

That breastfeeding is the optimal start for children is unquestioned, but there is little support for mothers who want to continue breastfeeding and put their babies in childcare. The default assumption is that mothers will have introduced a bottle, and often formula, in preparation for their return to work. In reality, there are many things that childcarers can do to facilitate the breastfeeding relationship.

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Hannukah

Image courtesy of digitalart at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Right now it’s the Jewish festival of Hannukah (or Chanukah). Tonight is the 4th night, when some people give presents. Others give presents only on the 5th night or every night. Hannukah lasts for 8 days and the symbol is a menorah, an 8 branched candle holder. The festival celebrates a miracle that happened after a small army of Jews known as the Maccabees defeated a much larger Greek army over 2000 years ago. When the Jews reached the Temple in Jerusalem they found there was only one small container of special purified oil to light the seven-branched Menorah, which needed to lit as part of the service every day. New oil would take eight days to make but the people lit the Menorah anyway and the oil miraculously burned for eight days until they had new oil.

The Hannukah menorah has eight candles, one for each day that the oil burned, and a servant candle that is used to right the others. The candle furthest to the right is lit on the first night. On the next night the candle to the left of the first candle and the first candle are lit, and it continues one new candle each night until the last night when all candles are lit. The candles are left burning for half an hour, but because today is Friday – the Jewish Sabbath – the candles will burn for half an hour. The menorah is supposed to be visible from outside and in Jerusalem there are special glass or plastic cases outside houses for it. In other countries the menorah is put in a window.

Because the feast is associated with oil it’s traditional to eat fried foods such as latkes (potato cakes) and doughnuts. It’s also traditional to play a game with a special toy called a dreidl. Long ago Jewish children weren’t allowed to study their religion in the open so they hid in caves. When soldies came by they hid what they were studying and started to play with the dreidl. It’s a game that you can play too using the printable templated from Enchanted Learning and some raisins or pieces of chocolate.

The dreidl has four sides with different characters and a pointed bottom. You spin the dreidl on the bottom and when it falls over the Hebrew character that shows tell you what to do. The characters are ש, ׁ ה , ג , נ .

 

The first character is ‘Nun’. You do nothing.

The second is ‘Gimel’. You can take everything in the middle of the table, and all the plays put a raisin or piece of chocolate in to make a new pot.

The third is ‘Hey’. You get to take half the goodies. If it’s an uneven number you leave the left over one in the middle.

The fourth character is ‘Shin’. You give a raisin or piece of chocolate to the pot. Better luck next time!

 

Au pair vs nanny

What is an au pair?

An au pair is a young person, usually aged 17-25, who comes to the UK with the aim of improving their English and/or experiencing life in another country. They can come from any country in the European union or certain other countries which are eligible for a Tier 5 Youth Mobility Scheme Visa, including Australia, Canada, Japan and New Zealand. They live with a family (there is no such thing as a live out au pair) and are provided with a bedroom, all meals and some pocket money in return for some light childcare and helping with household chores. They should be included in family activities such as days or meals out too.

What do they do?

Au pairs usually look after children aged 3+ outside school or nursery times, although they may work alongside a parent caring for younger children or do short periods of wraparound care. They can prepare simple meals, play with children, supervise homework (although they may not be able to help), take children to and from activities and do chores such as sweeping the floor, washing up or tidying up toys.

What can’t they do?

Au pairs are not suitable for full time care, especially of young children. A reliable au pair may be able to provide a few weeks of full time care in school holidays for additional pay or time off. They also don’t do heavy cleaning such as cleaning windows or bathrooms (except their own) or family laundry.

How much are they paid?

An au pair is usually paid £70-100 per week. If they are paid above the lower earnings limit you will need to register as an employer. You may also need to register as an employer if they get another job, for example a Saturday job. You will also be expected to provide some form of transport so they can get to English classes etc unless everything is within walking distance. In London this is usually an Oyster card, outside London it is more common for an au pair to be provided with a local bus pass or bicycle or be insured on a car.

 

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What is a nanny?

A nanny is a qualified or experienced childcarer who is able to take sole charge of children on a full or part time basis. They may be of any nationality as long as they have the right to work in the UK and any age from 18 to 70+. They can live in or live out and are paid a salary, from which tax and national insurance must be deducted by their employer.

What do they do?

A nanny will take care of everything to do with the children, from feeding and changing to providing educational activities, making food and bottles to children’s laundry and cleaning their bedrooms. Some nannies are also willing to batch cook meals to freeze for the children or the family or take on PA duties such as waiting in for parcels or repairmen and picking up dry cleaning. They will supervise and help with homework and music practice and may work overnight or at weekends in a proxy parent role.

What can’t they do?

There is virtually nothing a nanny can’t do, but there are limits to what most will be happy to do. Nannies are not housekeepers, they do not usually tidy up after parents or manage the house. They also can’t fly using an umbrella.

How much are they paid?

The 2013 nannytax salary survey showed that nanny ranges varied from £318 to £672 gross for a 50 hour week. Live in wages are typically lower than live out.

Baking with children

The return of the Great British Bake Off has got us all in a bit of a bakey mood and what better activity to fill those occasional wet summer days than a spot of baking?

Baking is great for children. It incorporates key skills such as literacy (reading a recipe and identifying ingredients) and numeracy (weighing and measuring quantities, or doubling a recipe if you’re feeling greedy), and introduces children to scientific concepts (mixing, melting, solidifying and why does it do that?), healthy eating (yes, really), and food hygiene. All that mixing and pouring, spooning and decorate works those motor skills to, so it’s not just about having a tasty cake for your afternoon snack, although that is obviously very important.

You can start baking with children from a very young age, as soon as they can hold a wooden spoon they can get involved in the process albeit mostly by banging on a saucepan but they’re seeing, and smelling, and learning, and it gives you a lot to talk about. Obviously it gets a lot more interesting, and messier, when they can start stirring for themselves, and even more interesting, and messy, when they can start weighing, pouring and spooning. But then they learn the important life skill of Clearing Up After Themselves.

If you’re a baking novice, never fear! You can learn along side the children, so here are some Really Easy Fairycakes to get you started and then you can graduate to Mary Berry GBBO standards. Happy baking!

 

Frances Norris is a former nanny and mother of two, whose children aged 3 and 8 months are in training for GBBO 2028.

Surviving emergency childcare

It happens to everyone at some point. Sick child, sick childminder or nanny, unexpected business trip, one child in hospital and siblings not allowed in or your carefully prepared backup plan for nursery closure has fallen through. You need emergency childcare. Apart from the logistics of sourcing a temporary nanny, emergency childminder or last minute nursery place there are a few things to consider. You want to make the handover as smooth and stressfree as possible for you, your temporary childcare and above all your child.

 

It happens to everyone at some point. Sick child, sick childminder or nanny, unexpected business trip, one child in hospital and siblings not allowed in or your carefully prepared backup plan for nursery closure has fallen through. You need emergency childcare. Apart from the logistics of sourcing a temporary nanny, emergency childminder or last minute nursery place there are a few things to consider. You want to make the handover as smooth and stress-free as possible for you, your temporary childcare and above all your child

 

There are many ways to find emergency childcare, via an agency or searching for temporary nannies with availability. It’s best to maximise your chances by following as many leads as possible. Once you’ve found someone don’t be tempted to skip steps – ask for at least 2 references and either request scans of their checks and qualifications or get them to bring them along so you can see for yourself before they start work.

Prepare your child as much as possible for the change to his routine by talking about the new childcare and highlighting the advantages and similarities. Reassure them that this isn’t a permanent change to their routine and they will be able to return to normal afterwards. A special comforter, blanket or cuddly toy, even if usually reserved for bedtimes, may help your child deal with the transition.

Leave a much detail as possible for your new nanny or childminder concerning your child’s routine and favourite foods and activities and, if you have chosen an emergency nanny, your house.An experienced temporary nanny will be used to parachuting in and getting on with it but it’s better to have too much detail than none at all. After all if everything is going well they may not need to refer to your speedily put together manual but should they need to know something it will make their life, and yours, a lot easier if they can just scan through to find what they need to know.

Where possible ensure sufficient time for a handover but don’t drag it out for too long. It’s hard leaving your child with someone she and you don’t know but it can be very confusing if you’ve explained that the emergency nanny or childminder is going to look after her and then you don’t leave. Tell the emergency childcarer to call you if there are any problems or your child doesn’t settle, and leave as many numbers as possible for you and your partner so you can be reached easily.

Discuss payment beforehand. There’s nothing worse than turning up at the end of the day with an empty purse to find that they are expecting cash. There’s nothing illegal about paying in cash, in fact many childcarers who take short-notice, short-term jobs prefer it as it means they know they’ve been paid. Be aware that paying in cash doesn’t necessarily mean you don’t have to deduct tax and National Insurance or a temporary nanny; some are self-employed but if they’re there for more than a few days they may be expecting you to act as their employer. If you already employ a nanny and use a payroll agency then they should be able to help you.

Prepare for emergencies by leaving a letter of consent for medical treatment. It would be exceptionally bad luck to face a trip to A&E on top of your childcare crisis but these things can happen and it’s safer to be prepared.

Finally, give yourself permission to make the day as easy as possible. The housework can wait, dinner can be the freezer’s finest or a takeaway, take a taxi – surviving emergency childcare is tough enough without extra work.

Hopefully you and your child will come through smiling, and even asking for your temporary nanny to come back!