Thyme for thinking

© Kuvona | Dreamstime.com

We’re pleased to welcome back Suzannah Thyme for her second post on the Nannyjob blog!

 

If you read my first post you might remember that our nanny has been with us for a year. The time has simply flown by and we count ourselves very lucky that Ellie has put up with us for this long. Having a nanny isn’t quite the same as having any other type of employee, particularly when it comes to managing performance and formal reviews. It tends to be an ongoing process – slightly elongated handovers or a sit down with a cup of tea on the rare days that I do work from home while Ol naps – for us at least and the idea of ‘managing’ Ellie in that way filled me with trepidation.

 

I turned where most people do these days, the internet, for to gather advice and gauge opinions on what was and wasn’t normal. It seemed a mixed bag, some had a very formal process with a self-evaluation form to comment on their performance, others let it slide by with nothing at all, a good number had an informal meeting or formal chat with a bit of warning that the contract would be reviewed. After canvassing Ed for his opinion, which elicited the information that he was going on a 10 day business trip of which I had no prior knowledge, we (read: I) decided on the slightly more formal chat approach.

 

The next challenge was when to schedule it. Evenings aren’t the best time for anyone and mornings tend to be rushed, certainly on my part, so we were evidently going to have to put aside a specific time. In the end it seemed most sensible to ask Ellie for the equivalent of a babysit and explain that we’d chat once Ol was in bed – takeaway and wine included. Luckily she was amenable to this plan, but once again the nagging conscience which insists that she’s entitled to her own life outside of work and this was an intrusion wouldn’t quite go away, as it does every time we ask for a babysit even though she insists she doesn’t mind.

 

Time and place set I turned my mind to the content. What does one discuss in a nanny’s review? Evaluating performance over the past year was easy -“You’re doing a brilliant job, will you stay until Ol leaves home?” was what I essentially wanted to say. There were no foreseeable changes and we didn’t need to modify the contract. Once again I turned to the internet and discovered that nannies typically wanted to discuss holiday and payrises. Ah.

 

Holiday isn’t a problem as far as I know. Bank Holidays off, 2 weeks her choice, which she tends to take a one week and then a few days here and there, 2 weeks ours, except it’s been more over the last year, and the time between Christmas and New Year. We’ve never sorted our holiday out that far in advance, although maybe we should talk about that and pencil in key dates. And dates when holiday wouldn’t work so well for us. But the idea of a payrise strikes fear into my heart.

 

Much as we love Ellie and I would pay her millions if I could we’re stretching our budget already to afford a nanny for one child. It’s a luxury for us and any rise we could afford would be paltry in the extreme on an hourly basis. We gave a bonus at Christmas, which is uncomfortably close to the review given that I’ve not been paid for January yet, but then again it’s not really her fault she started a new job so close to Christmas when I would happily have given a bonus in June. Sitting down with a calculator I worked out we could afford about £75 a month over a year, which doesn’t sound a lot. If anyone has any ideas on extra things I can do to show appreciation I’d be grateful….

Tablets for tots

You’ll have noticed that THE present for children this year was…. a tablet.

From LeapFrog’s LeapPad and VTech’s Innotab  to Asus’ Nexus 7 and Apple’s iPad mini, tablets are everywhere, loaded with educational apps and games to keep children amused. So what are the pros and cons of tablets for tots?

+1 They’re ultra portable

Books, DVDs, CDs, card games, pens and paper. Leave them all at home, there’s an app that will so it for you. You can also access media content legally for much less than the book or DVD would cost and easily pop on something for you too.

+1 They’re intuitive

Even children as young as 1 can get their heads around touch screen technology. Unlike traditional PC based educational games tablet apps are easy to get to grips with.

+ They promote hand eye coordination and fine motor skills, literacy and mathematical ability

Children have to learn to control their hands and fingers to use a tablet, and some games encourage matching, sorting and counting skills,  shape, number and letter recognition, and phonics, as well as making a variety of e-books easily accessible.

+ They grow and evolve with the child

Leapfrog and Vtech etc aside adults can get as much use out of tablets as children and teens. The sheer number of apps is staggering and a new tablet now should, barring breakages, provide entertainment for years that can vary according the child’s tastes.

-1 They stifle the imagination

There are some good, creative drawing and music apps out there but it’s no substitute for the opportunities real art materials or musical instruments give you. There’s also no scope to put a lion on Old MacDonald’s farm or adapt what the wheels on the bus do if you’re just listening to a recorded version.

-1 They’re fragile

Most tablets aren’t hugely robust, even when they come encased in rubber, and older children will probably want a 7-inch adult tablet anyway. Young children can’t appreciate that their new toy is a complex electronic device to be treated with care and even with the best will in the world a older child may accidentally drop it.

-1 They’re sedentary activities

You don’t move much when you’re using a tablet and it’s certainly no substitute for running around outside. Repetitive use of one hand could also lead to RSI, especially as the way children use touch screen technology when they’re young will set them up for how they use it in later life and it’s not going away.

-1 Children can access the Internet unsupervised or run up a bill buying apps

Most tablets aimed at the children’s market incorporate parental control but if you accidentally leave that off and your iTunes or Android marketplace account logged it’s scarily easy and fast for a child to run up a bill. Most free apps include a quick link to the full version and an imprudent tap or two could be pricy.

-1 They’re addictive

You know those adults who always have some kind of electronic device in their hand? Chances are they’re addicted. The brain quickly becomes dependent on the instant gratification a smartphone can provide and this can also less to problems with concentration later on. Children are especially vulnerable because their brains are still very plastic, which means new habits can form easily.
Our verdict:

Handle with care, both literally and figuratively! While they might keep children occupied for hours, you should also make time for activities away from the tablet, even if you’re essentially doing the same thing. If you’re a childcarer make sure to communicate with the parents about appropriate usage and stick to their rules.  Consider limiting use to specific locations or certain times of day to ensure that it isn’t overused and always double check the content and parental controls on a standard tablet. Finally, remember an interactive tablet is no substitute for an interactive adult!

Keeping up with the Thymes

Nannyjob is delighted to introduce our new parent blogger -Mrs Thyme – who will be blogging about the ups and downs of employing a nanny and family life.

© Kuvona | Dreamstime.com

Let me start by saying I’ve never actually blogged before. I love and loathe in equal parts the various Mummy blogs that pop up periodically on my Twitter feed – love them because I’m a proper nosy parker, secretly loathe them because they are filled with the kind of perfection I aspire to. So bear with me while I work this out and here goes!

 

The logical place to start seems to be introducing our family, a cosy little group of 3 – Suzannah (that’s me), Edward and Oliver (18 months) – plus 1 –   Ellie, our nanny who has been with us for almost exactly a year. We all work full time, Ol probably hardest of all playing and growing, and are probably all having trouble adjusting after time off over Christmas.

 

It’s times like this, after the holidays, where I feel enormously grateful for having a nanny. Colleagues who drop their children at a child-minder or nursery don’t have the luxury of coming home to a tidy house and an empty laundry basket. I don’t know how she does it but Ellie by herself with Ol is more productive than Ed and I put together tag teaming toddler demands and miscellaneous household tasks like putting a wash on and hanging it out to dry. Add cooking 2 nutritious meals, and fitting in a class or run around at the park and some kind of art, craft or baking. I’m exhausted thinking about it.

 

I’ve tried to see how it’s done when working from home, but I know nannies hate that (parents working from home, not domestic espionage) because you disrupt their routine, no matter how hard you try to limit your caffeine and biscuit consumption so you don’t need to go to the kitchen. Children’s bat like hearing can pick your voice up from the other end of the house if you’re on the phone to a colleague or a client and you can forget about going to the loo. I laugh at people who say working at home is wonderfully relaxing. They either have school-aged children, or better yet no children at all, and sit productively at their computer simultaneously dyeing their hair and waiting for their toenails to dry. I tried it once but the increasingly loud sighs and increasingly lengthy tantrums every time I popped back to the bathroom to complete the next stage of my beautification put me off.

 

A couple of days after the announcement that I’ll be working from home I’ll be treated to an anecdote from Ellie about something a work-from-home boss of a nanny friend of hers has done. It’s a subtle, yet effective, way of letting me know that I shouldn’t even think about committing that particular sin, although some of them are rather funny like the MumBoss who didn’t get dressed until 10am and took very serious conference calls wearing slinky PJs. I thought in the beginning Ellie would be glad to shorten her day by the 3 hours that cover my commute (yes, 3 hours, the District line can be a little challenging) – fully paid of course – and have the opportunity to have a real lunch-break, maybe even schedule a hair appointment because I don’t mind being flexible, but it seems that isn’t the case, so I rarely do. I will commit the sin from time to time just to save myself the commute and prove that I can be productive whilst working from home, building up credit for those vaccinations, birthdays and, way into the future, first days at nursery or school and nativity plays or end of term shows. In a way I understand, it takes a brave person to sing, dance and discipline a toddler under the watchful eye of another adult, and I would hate my own boss breathing down my neck all the time.

 

So today I’m at work, and basking in the knowledge that when I arrive home we’ll have lasagna for dinner tonight and Ol’s washing will be underway and there may even be cake. If I did all that I’d expect Ed to bring me flowers, so I’ll just pencil in a stop on the way home to pick something up for Ellie even though she does it every day and I can’t thank her enough.

 

 

 


Nannies: what you need for 2013

Last year we posted what you needed for 2012 and we thought we’d revisit the topic again for 2013.

Instead of focusing on skills which will enhance your CV this time we’re going to take a look at some other qualities and areas of knowledge. In a competitive market it’s vital to be able to walk the walk as well as talk the talk so here are some things to think about.

1. Organisation

This goes for both jobseekers and nannies in work. Make sure you start with organising yourself – are all your qualifications and certificates up to date? Don’t wait until the month before your First Aid certificate expires to book a course! Get into the habit of keeping a diary where you can note important dates in advance as well as keeping on top of your day to day schedule. Employers are increasingly reliant on nannies to keep things ticking over so make sure you’re on top of important events for your charges and be proactive in getting things ready the night before for the following day or adding household essentials to the shopping list.

2. Thrift

Speaking of shopping lists we can’t ignore the fact that most of us are still in belt-tightening mode. A thrifty nanny makes use of free activities both at home and out and about. Walk instead of using the car, keep on top of whats in the fridge so you don’t waste food (try BBC Food for a nifty ingredients tool) and embrace the joys of junk modelling and other free crafts. Engage the children as well by setting a no-spend day each week. This will help them to appreciate activities which cost money even more. For those with older charges get them involved in budgeting, especially for holiday activities.

3. Nutrition

There’s been a big focus in recent years around child nutrition and establishing good habits for children early on. A basic knowledge of nutrition is a must for all nannies, as are basic cooking skills (although you’d be amazed how much can be eaten raw and how good it is for you). Gone are the days of Nanny’s Nursery Puds – the modern nanny is an expert on toddler friendly salad and ways to prefer with oily fish. If you don’t know your vitamins from your minerals in the kitchen consider going on a Nutrition for Nannies course.

4. The gift of the gab

Another focus area in the Early Years is on communication. Children need to have the opportunity to hear a wide range of words and phrases in context and the opportunity to interact with adults to try out their own developing skills. Providing a wide variety of activities is one way to do this but you must make sure you’re talking and describing reerything that you’re doing or seeing, remembering to leave time for the children to get a word in edgeways too! If you have a pre-verbal charge talking is still important because children are building up their understanding grammar and vocabulary right from the start, well before they have enough control over their throat and mouth to form words. You could even incorporate a few basic baby signs to encourage then to ‘talk back’ to you. Always remember to talk and sign, though, because baby sign is an aid to communication, not a complete method (unlike BSL or ASL).

5. Political awareness

It probably hasn’t escaped your notice that childcare has been hitting the headlines over the last few months. There are big changes coming for the sector and they may affect nannies. It’s well worth your while keeping up with these developments and assessing what impact they will have on you.

We would like to wish you a happy and successful 2013! Be sure to check back here regularly for updates and comment to let us know your thoughts.

‘Hurrah’ to the Royal Baby.. ‘Boo’ to the acute morning sickness!

Hyperemesis Gravidarum – The Facts

Along with everyone else in the UK, Nannyjob let out a huge ‘Hurrah’ this week upon hearing the lovely royal baby news. We’ve all watched this perfect pair go through the courtship we all envied, then the wedding of the century. And now, the ultimate – a new cute bundle of joy for the nation’s sweethearts.

So, after our excitement had (only mildly) died down, we started to feel really quite sorry for the beautiful Kate, as we heard that she’d been admitted to a London hospital with hyperemesis gravidarum (a.k.a acute morning sickness). Now you may be thinking that all or most expectant mums get a bit of morning sickness – true, but this acute condition means that rehydration is needed, hence the hospitalisation. So, as we are always here to be the fountain of knowledge to our lovely readers (or tell you what the doctors say!), here we explain what Kate is going through:

  • hyperemesis gravidarum, is a serious medical condition with potential consequences for mother and baby.
  • by definition, the condition is the loss of at least 5% of the total body weight.
  • while seven out of ten pregnant women suffer nausea, usually in the first three months, some are sick morning noon and night throughout, vomiting as much as 25 times a day.
  • Other than the vomiting and nausea the mother might also experience very sensitive olfactory sensations, bad taste in the mouth, shivering, difficulty reading (from dehydration and changes to the eye), and delayed gastric emptying.
  • Charlotte Bronte is believed to have been a victim. Women were dying from this condition up to the 1950’s.
  • Now dehydration can be treated with a drip and is a common reason for hospitalisation accounting for more than 25,000 admissions a year.
  • Now for the fun bit – A Swedish study in The Lancet in 1999 suggested women suffering from the condition were slightly more likely to be carrying a girl (we’re already making a list of potential royal girls names!).

Nannyjob is super excited about the royal baby, and wishes Kate and William the very best of luck with their pregnancy. And who knows.. They might even start their search for a nanny soon….! 😉

 

 

‘What If Money Didn’t Matter?’

Yesterday here at Nannyjob towers, we came across something utterly fantastic – this video, that was flagged up through the powers of social media (our Facebook page!).

To say that this really got us thinking would be a huge understatement. The narrator, the late Alan Watts, takes us through the video, asking the listener to consider something  that they may possibly have never really considered before – what they would REALLY want to do with their life, if money didn’t matter.

So, as I’m sure you can imagine, when the Nannyjob team comes across something as thought provoking as this, it leads to a big discussion about how these principals apply to children. We all pretty much agreed that encouraging a child to follow their heart and gravitate towards what they love doing, rather than what might be a ‘sensible’ option, was incredibly important for their long term happiness.

There are still many parents out there who push their child into doing what they themselves think is most beneficial to get them a ‘good’ career. A recent example is a parent I came across at a local private school, who is a surgeon (as is her husband). Clearly a very clever couple in so many ways you might think, although I was utterly flabbergasted at their response to their 10 year old’s new found love of archaeology: “We’ve told him that it’s ok to like it now, but not to get too interested in it, as it wouldn’t be a good career choice”.

Oh. My. Goodness. Me! This child is TEN for God’s sake! And he REALLY ENJOYS archaeology! Apart from this, if they’re concerned about future financial successes for their LITTLE boy, surely some of the world’s leading archaeologists are onto a really high earner? Needless to say, Nannyjob was very confused (and a little sad) about this.

It appears that for many parents, this is the chosen approach. Very often the children are denied what they love doing, and are steered in the direction of something they aren’t remotely interested in, or naturally good at. The parents are then surprised when their child grows up and rebels, or even worse, spends their entire career totally miserable. Of course, this is not always the case, as many children in this position actually start believing  that this approach is the best, and that denying themselves of a degree and potentially a job in archaeology, art, dance, or whatever they actually enjoy but were told wasn’t ‘sensible’ is more beneficial to them. But I bet my last nannying pound that they turn around one day, even if it is in retirement, and say ‘what if I’d done what I really wanted….’.

So our advice is to most definitely follow the late, great Mr Watts’ advice after you watch this video, and to do what you REALLY want to do, and encourage your children the same. They will thank you for it, we promise….

To watch the video Click here!

 

 

The Dummy Debate: Pro’s And Cons

The issue is far from black and white. You’ll hear parents raving about dummies or reviling them. We look at expert Wendy C. Fries’ arguments over the pros and cons of dummies.

The pros: A few reasons to use a dummy

There are many good reasons to use dummies – just ask any parent who’s managed to get a moment of peace with the judicious use of one. But a bit of peace isn’t the only plus. Others include:

  • Possible protection against sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). The Department of Health advises that giving your baby a dummy at the start of any sleep period may reduce the risk of SIDS. Use the dummy when putting baby down to sleep – don’t put it back in baby’s mouth once he’s already asleep.
  • Helping babies pacify themselves. Infants need ways to help soothe themselves and a dummy can be a source of comfort for a crying or colicky baby.
  • It satisfies the suck reflex. Some babies have a need to suck that exceeds the time they get on the bottle or breast. For these infants, a dummy can meet this very real need.
  • Easier weaning. When you’re ready for a child to stop, it’s much easier to wean them from a dummy than off their thumb.

Cons: Reasons to avoid a dummy

While some parents hope to avoid dummies altogether, many experts don’t think that’s necessary. Yet there are a few issues to watch for when using a dummy:

  • Research has suggested that there may be a link between use of a dummy and recurrent ear infections in young children. Researchers aren’t sure why this happens, but suspect it may be due to a change in pressure between the middle ear and upper throat. The Department of Health advises that parents who give their child a dummy should not be overly concerned by these research findings. It was not clear, it notes, whether parents participating in the research had a tendency to use dummies to soothe young children who were prone to recurrent ear infections.
  • If a dummy is introduced too early, there’s the risk of nipple confusion for a baby who’s just learning to suckle. When a baby is being breastfed, it’s best not to give a dummy until breastfeeding is well established, usually at about one month old.
  • Parents can mistakenly offer a dummy when the baby really needs nutrition-based sucking, such as a breast or bottle.
  • Babies who are overzealous suckers, or who use a dummy for long periods, may have problems as their teeth grow and develop.  Overuse of a dummy can also hinder speech development, which is why it’s recommended that you try to limit the times your baby uses a dummy, and to wean your baby off the dummy completely by the age of one.

 Wendy C. Fries is senior editor with WebMD

Source: www.webmd.boots.com

 

Cold and Flu relief – What Did Those Old Wives Do?!

Brrrrrr. It’s cold here at Nannyjob. So cold that we’re cranking up the heating to full, fishing out our thickest thermals and drawing the curtains before the 6 o’clock news (have you sussed yet that we’re possibly Summer peeps?!). It’s not all bad though, the Coca Cola train and John Lewis ads have started sweeping that annual feeling of nostalgia into our living rooms, and we’re enjoying cosying up together talking about what Santa might bring.. BUT, just one very wintery problem to sort out first –

COLDS GALORE! As usual in Winter, we have little ones here with sniffles and colds, so as well as the saviour of all things that is Calpol coming to the rescue, this year we have decided to give some of the old wives tales of cold and flu relief a go on our little ones to find out which really work, and which are plain, well, silly.. and as always, we’re sharing our best bits of advice with our lovely readers!

Chicken Soup.

Something of an icon of cold relievers, this one brings back memories of my childhood, where any sick days from school always meant a large bowl of the good stuff whilst watching lunchtime Neighbours and Going For Gold. I seem to recall it always working (rose tinted childhood specs?!). Apparently heat is the key, so any soup will work to a degree, as it promotes airway secretions and has a calming action on inflamed throats. But chicken soup’s combination of fats, spices, and water seems to work best when it comes to breaking up mucus.

Nannyjob effectiveness rating – 7/10

Hot Toddy (minus alcohol!).

Now, again, my childhood memories of cold relief seem to include a cheeky teeny tiny drop of brandy in a hot toddy at bedtime. Not only did I feel very grown up, but I slept and felt rested (it was the 80’s and my family are Irish!). Of course, we DO NOT advise alcohol in this one for kids, but it can be done without. Mix 1 tsp of honey with a good squeeze of lemon juice, and hot water in a mug. The honey soothes, and the hot fluid has a demulcent and soothing action, with slightly bitter flavours such as lemon it is particularly beneficial.

Nannyjob effectiveness rating – 8/10

Vitamin C.

Your child should have a good all-year-round supply of this good stuff to help ward off nastiness. According to a large review of clinical research at Helsinki University, regular doses of vitamin C may cut an adult’s cold duration in half and a child’s by a day. Now, in our experience vitamin C is a better deterrent for colds than a cure once one has begun, but it’s never a bad thing to add an extra dose when little one has a cold. As well as giving them lots of fruit and veg, our favourite vitamin C supplement for kids is from Haliborange (www.seven-seas.com/Haliborange).

Nannyjob effectiveness rating – 9/10

Garlic.

The Nannyjob jury is out on this one. Yes, it may be beneficial, but how many children do you know who would happily drink a mixture of warm milk and crushed garlic without feeling sick? Our advice – add a little bit extra into your evening meals so little one gets an edible dose. Allicin, an active compound in garlic, is known to act as a decongestant, and garlic is known to have high antioxidant properties, so it’s worth getting your Italian cookbooks out whilst you have a cold-ridden child!

Nannyjob effective as rating – 6/10.

Fresh air.

Again, we know this is a great boost to the system in many ways, but we’re a little dubious about sending our little ones out into the garden to play when they’re poorly. If you’re going to try this one, make sure they’re really well wrapped up and don’t stay out more than 10 minutes when poorly. According to Thomas Weidner of Ball State University, light exercise in fresh air can ease a runny nose, sore throat, or sneezing.

Nannyjob effectiveness rating – 6/10.

 Do you have any other old wives tales that work? Make sure you share your gems of knowledge with us if so! Now, back to what Santa might bring…. 😉

Feel free to comment on this blog, or let us know your own ideas for cold and flu relief on our Facebook page.

Career Re-Entry for the At-Home Parent

So, the difficult decision of ‘staying at home for the first few years’ was made whilst pregnant… the satisfaction of being there for first teeth, first steps, first day at school was achieved over those years… You’re getting a fantastic nanny lined up through Nannyjob for when you have time to go back into work… Everything seems to have fallen perfectly….

And now it’s time to get back into the big wide world of work…. Simple, hey?! Well, not always, actually. As well as the economy altering drastically, many companies now require far more innovative techniques, international networks, cost-saving approaches and collaborations – all leading to suggest that those few years at home, although great for you and your child in so many ways, may actually lead at best a real struggle to find the kind of position that you felt over qualified for before you left work to be a mummy. Or at worst to career suicide.

Continue reading “Career Re-Entry for the At-Home Parent”

Positive Parenting Techniques

We all know that if you have one or more children in your care for any length of time, feeling like being consistently positive about their behaviour (instead of tearing your hair out and yelling like a banshee) can be a real mean feat.

The experts tell us that ‘positive parenting’ – i.e. encouraging positive traits a child might have when you might normally want to pull them up on a misbehaviour, is actually the best way to train them into behaving. Becoming angry is generally not an effective way of disciplining a child. But how easy is this in reality? When you’re at the end of a long day and your patience is being tested by a naughty little one, could you really just be positive?

Continue reading “Positive Parenting Techniques”