Category: Guest blogs

What you aren’t expecting when living and working with children

Even if you’ve got experience with children, if you haven’t lived and worked with them full time, and you’re not a parent yourself, these may take you by surprise!

 

1. Bumps and bruises

 

It’s surprising how strong these little people are! Whether you’re playing a game, taking a trip to the park or changing a nappy, you’re susceptible to bashes, knocks, and bumps which means that you’re covered in bruises yourself (especially if you bruise easily). I’m always finding bruises and trying to remember where I got them – it could be from anything, the baby dropping a toy on your foot, or an accidental kick when pushing a child on the swings!

 

2. Sleep

 

We all know that not all children sleep through the night, especially when they’re young, but what surprised me was the amount of different things that can disturb the night. From bedwetting, to ‘I just can’t sleep’, night time feeds, illness and nightmares… And then they will be up early in the morning too!

 

3. All things slime

 

Who knew how much snot and dribble could come out of those little humans! If they’re a bit older, they’ll deal with a lot of this themselves, but for young children and babies, it’s a constant battle to wipe noses, change nappies, and clear up dribble!

 

4. Laundry

 

You might have heard about how much laundry a baby makes, but did you ever think that some of that would be yours? A jumper you may have once been able to wear a few times before a wash, now might not last a full day!

 

5. Creatures

 

If your charges are at school or nursery, it is likely that they will come into contact with all kinds of germs and parasites. Think headlice, worms and chicken pox. Sadly these things aren’t contained just to the child and will most likely be spread to you, which means nitcombing and medicine for you too! Yuk!

 

6. Getting attached

 

Even after all of that, you will grow to love the little monsters. They’ll make you smile, give you cuddles and do some very cute and funny things so if you take a holiday away, expect to miss them!

 

Thanos for sharing, Cate! If you have something you’d like to share just drop us a line on frances@nannyjob.co.uk

The importance of being professional

What makes a professional nanny? It’s a question that comes up time and time and time again and I’m yet to find a satisfactory answer. It’s one I’ve attempted to answer hundreds of times in the course of my job. When someone asks me what a nanny is, I can tell them. When someone asks me what a nanny does, easy peasy. Then they spring the million dollar question on me – what makes a professional nanny?

Nannies don’t have to be registered. If they were it would be easy. We could say that a professional nanny is one that’s registered. Job done. But the current OFSTED register has nothing to do with professionalism, and you don’t even have to be on it which means there are hundreds, if not thousands, of professional nannies out there who don’t need to go through the hassle because their employers can’t get childcare vouchers. Then, dare I say it, there are people on the register who don’t deserve to be called professional nannies at all. Anyone can spend a weekend taking a course, pay up for insurance, get a DBS check. Hey presto! You’re OFSTED registered, but you’re not professional. You may not even have a job.

But just having a nanny job, or even having been a nanny for a couple of years, isn’t enough to make a nanny professional either. Professional nannies take pride in their work. Professional nannies are the ones who are constantly observing and reacting to their charges’ needs. Professional nannies understand the importance of ongoing training and personal development. And there’s a whole unspoken code of behaviour that professional nannies adhere to as well. For example, no professional nanny works without a contract and no professional nanny leaves a job without giving the notice in the contract. No matter how much you hate the family, a professional nanny doesn’t up and leave. You can, professionally, negotiate a reduced notice period or offer to take any holiday due, but you don’t just not turn up for work. Of course you can rant and rave and threaten to walk out but when it comes down to it you wouldn’t. 

Walking out is just one sign of a lack of professionalism. A professional nanny wouldn’t go through their bosses’ wardrobe and wear their clothes. A professional nanny doesn’t socialise on work time without permission. A professional nanny doesn’t eat their employers out of house and home. It’s all about boundaries. A professional nanny knows where they are, and if s/he doesn’t then s/he is professional enough to ask the question.

So already a professional nanny is one who makes a career out of it, who keeps up with the latest guidance and research, who seeks to develop his or her skills, who has a legal employment relationship with the parents of his or her charges, who communicates in a clear, sensitive and timely way with their employers, who respects boundaries…. I could go on, but it would take me all day and it’s not really supposed to be the point of the blog post. No matter what you think being a professional is, being professional is important.

No nanny exists in isolation. Even when there are no other nannies in the area the actions of a nanny towards his or her change and his or employers represent all nannies everywhere. You may be the only nanny a person sees, and if nannies as a profession want to be taken seriously then all nannies need to act it. Next time you go to a nanny interview and the parents sit there and want to pay you a net salary without declaring tax and national insurance it’s your professional duty to explain why it’s wrong. When you need to discuss something that isn’t going well having a track record of acting professionally means that your employers or an agency will take you more seriously. And when you see unprofessional behaviour from another nanny you need to call them on it.

I know what you’re thinking. “Hang on a minute. I need to be professional but we don’t know what professional is….even someone from the association of professional nannies doesn’t know what it is”. Yes, to a point. But I’m thinking you know what professional means to you, and I’m thinking you have an idea of what is and isn’t acceptable behaviour for nannies. So even if my idea of professionalism and you idea of professionalism aren’t identical, I think we can agree on the broad picture, and I think it’s time to act.

Frances Norris is the Policy & Review Officer for the British Association for Professional Nannies. She is involved in representing nannies to the Government, most recently concerning the tax free childcare scheme and giving evidence to the Childcare Payments Bill committee. She is still working on an answer to get her million dollars.

Kubb (Viking Chess)

I want to tell you all about a great game I discovered this summer. It’s great fun for adults and kids, very simple to play and you can play it almost anywhere there’s a patch of grass. My charges love the grisly origins of the game and it’s inspired us to learn about the Vikings.

 

The idea is simple. You throw sticks of wood at your opponents’ blocks of wood and try to knock them down so you can knock down the big block of wood – the king – in the middle. Originally the sticks of wood were leg bones and the blocks of wood were skulls, but don’t let that put you off! Each team starts with a line of 5 ‘skulls’ and 6 ‘bones’ and you have to throw your bones at your opponents skulls and try to knock them over. If you knock over a skull then next turn your opponents throw the skulls into your half and then have to knock all those skulls down before they can hit any skulls left on your line. Occasionally you knock over a skull on the line before you’ve knocked down the ones you’re supposed to have first but that’s okay because you have one more throw to get the remaining skull(s). If you don’t knock down all the skulls in the middle then on your opponents’ next go they can throw from any of the skulls left standing, which means they can be a lot closer to your line. When all the skulls on the line have been knocked down you can throw your bones at the king in the middle, which is bigger and heavier than the normal skulls, and try to knock it over. First to get all their opponents’ skulls and the king wins, but if you knock over the king before you’ve got all the other skulls you lose! There are a couple of other rules but that’s the basic idea, and games last between 15 minutes and an hour, depending on how good you are at aiming!

 

It’s a great game for improving throwing skills and you can adapt the size of the pitch to suit smaller players because it’s just marked out by pegs. Adults and older children can play on a full size pitch which is about 5 paces by 10 paces, but the exact size isn’t important. We’re playing with a 3 year old in tow so our pitch is about half the size. You only need 2 players but teams can be up to 6 on each side and we always attract a couple of children we’ve never met before each time we play it at the park.

 

The only downside to the game is that the wooden pieces are quite heavy to carry about, but don’t let that stop you trying this great game.

Parent v Nanny

Today we’ve got a special guest blog from Tanya, talking about her transition from being a nanny to motherhood.

 

I qualified as a nursery nurse over 15 years ago. Since then I have worked with children of all ages from 3 months up to 12 years both in educational settings and as a Nanny.

In October 2009 I found out I was expecting our first child. At that time I had been with my current family for 4 years, caring for 2 children.

I felt pretty well equipped for once baby came home etc. but was fairly nervous about the actual delivery! Fear of the unknown I suppose.

I was lucky enough to be given ante-natal classes as a gift from my employers. My husband and I were keen to meet people at the same stage as we were and learn a bit more about the imminent delivery! The people we met at class gave us a great support network for once baby arrived. The classes also provided good information about the weeks ahead and of course the all important delivery!

Lily arrived a week early. An easy pregnancy ended with a slightly less easy delivery. Once she did arrive emotions were definitely altered forever.

The obvious main difference in being a parent is ultimately your decision is final, which sometimes feels very daunting.

In my role as a nanny I work with parents and discuss ideas to improve or manage various situations or scenarios. I’m not the type of nanny who expects the parents to do everything my way but work more as a team to get better results.

As a parent you are more aware of making decisions and how this will affect your lives. I think having a newborn and the tiredness and emotions that go along with this made it much harder to work through phases.

As a nanny I also had fairly fixed ideas of how I was going to ‘manage’ my new baby. Due to various reasons this didn’t happen and I did feel under extra pressure to do the ‘right’ thing. Ultimately the ‘right’ thing is that you feel comfortable in your daily decisions and that you and baby are happy and settled.

Outside pressure also affected me a lot. I was lucky to have lots of friends who work in childcare or who have their own children (or both!). Obviously everyone likes to help and support a friend and advice was always welcome. However they all had their own words of wisdom. At the time I felt I should take every point if view on board rather than do what was best for us as a family.

Having a ‘difficult’ baby isn’t easy and even my years of training didn’t prepare me for the constant demands of being a mummy. Of course I would never change being a mummy but there is definitely something to be said for clocking on and off as a nanny!

As Lily has got older she has become a very lively, funny and inquisitive girl. She likes to push boundaries and has a very strong sense of being her own person. Of course as a nanny working through the terrible twos and potty training is just part of the job. As a parent it’s non stop – no finishing at 6pm, having to be on top of a situation 100% of the time and multitasking household chores. You forget as a nanny you are there just for the children and that’s what you are paid to do so anything extra gets put to one side.

As a working mum, I still nanny part time with Lily coming along too. Time can seem limited but we try to do things together everyday and Lily gets to do a variety of activities. Consistency is key and we try hard to keep the rules the same regardless of if we are at home, at work, or just out and about. She’s not perfect but she’s 3 and spirited.

For me being a mum is a much harder job than being a nanny but I’m sure this isn’t the case for everyone!

 

Meet The Blissful Baby Expert

 

 

This is a guest blog from Lisa Clegg, author of The Blissful Baby Expert. She shares how she came to write her manual for parents.

I grew up the 4th eldest out of 26 grandchildren, surrounded by babies and small children from a young age. I’ve always been particularly interested in small babies and I was always the one who volunteered to take any babies off their parents’ hands at family get togethers and parties!

All I ever wanted to do was get a job working with children and after leaving school I went straight to college to do what was then called the NNEB-equivalent to an NVQ level 3 in childcare.

After completing the 2-year course I went straight into my 1st nanny position where I had sole charge of 3 children. I continued in nannying up until I had my 1st baby  – Jack – in October 2002.

After my 2nd son was born in 2006, I began doing some maternity night nanny contracts. I discovered night nannying by accident really browsing though the nannyjob website which I enjoyed doing on a regular basis. Like many people I knew that some mothers employ someone to come and live in and help them after the birth of their baby, a Maternity Nurse.  However, I didn’t realise that a mother could employ someone to  JUST do the nights-allowing her the crucial part of the day covered so that she could get some sleep! Having just gone through the sleepless nights myself with my 2nd baby I knew first hand how torturous it can be when feel like you will never get a full night’s sleep again! A good night’s sleep means you feel like you can cope with anything during the day!

I absolutely loved night nannying as it gave me access to the age group I loved working with the most – those tiny newborns – and I knew exactly how the mothers I worked for would be feeling. I LOVE my job and get so much satisfaction from starting work with a new family, who are usually in chaos with neither parent knowing quite where to start! It’s fantastic to leave them confident about caring for their baby, with a happy baby who eats and sleeps well.

By using a routine as a basis and gently steering babies in the right direction from day 1,  I have left happy parents at the end of each contract whose babies typically drop their night feed between 8-10 weeks, settle well during sleep times and are in general very relaxed happy babies from day to day.

It has worked for many mums and babies and it was all of them that inspired me to write my book THE BLISSFUL BABY EXPERT. I wanted to reach out to so many more parents who are desperate for answers to basic questions and who just need someone to point them in the right direction of keeping life with a new-born baby on an even keel. My book gives mums that starting block and as a mother of 3 children myself I understand first hand how difficult life with a new-born can be when you are not sure where to begin!

This guide has information on essential and non-essential items and equipment to buy for your baby, what to expect when going into hospital, coming home and the first few days and weeks, feeding, sleep, weaning, common problems and illnesses for mum and baby and even developmental milestones.

It has been tested by many parents with young babies and they all agree that there is nothing on the market that is as honest, informative and parent friendly. All reviews so far have been fantastic. As a mother, I can empathise with  all these parents and have been through many of the same scenarios. This is not something that a lot of authors who have written parenting books can say, as many of them have never had their own children and experienced the challenges that motherhood brings!

I hope that my book will continue to help many more mums in the future.

 

THE BLISSFUL BABY EXPERT can be purchased from Amazon in ebook form, which can be downloaded to an Ipad or Iphone as well as many other devices once the kindle App has been installed,  or paperbacks can be ordered through the website www.theblissfulbabyexpert.co.uk