Online Safety For Kids: What Parents And Nannies Need To Know

Keeping up with and supervising children’s online activity can be challenging, especially when they have their own computers, smartphones and tablets. www.getsafeonline.org helps us give you a guide below to understand the risks.

The Risks

Inappropriate contact: from people who may wish to abuse, exploit or bully them.
Inappropriate conduct: because of their own and others’ online behaviour, such as the personal information they make public. They may also become either targets or perpetrators of cyberbullying.
Inappropriate content: being able to access sexually explicit, racist, violent, extremist or other harmful material.
Commercialism: directing aggressive advertising and marketing material at children.
Children gaining access to your own personal information stored on your computer.
Children enabling viruses and spyware by careless or misinformed use of your computer.

Keeping Children Safe Online

There are a number of online age-appropriate educational resources available to parents/guardians and teachers, and children themselves, covering every aspect of online safety for children.

You should also take the following measures. Remember that these factors will change as children grow up and should be reconsidered regularly.

Set ground rules about use of the internet, email and texts. They should learn to take responsibility for their own actions and develop their own judgement.
Make children aware that online contacts may not be who they say they are.
Children must keep personal details private.
Ensure that they use a family email address when filling in online forms.
They must never meet unsupervised with anyone they have contacted via the internet.
Get children to report concerns about conversations, messages and behaviours to you or another known and trusted adult. Encourage them to share their internet experience with you and make it a shared family experience.
Get children to report bullying online, by text or phone immediately to you.
Use the parental control settings on your browser, search engine and internet security package.
Alternatively, consider buying specialist parental control software.
Block pop-ups and spam emails.
Consider enabling online access from only a family computer located in a shared room.
Always sit with younger children when they are online.
Consider choosing a child-friendly home page in your browser settings.
Learn the language of chatrooms and log on yourself so you know how it works.
Consider setting up a family e-mail account which can be used specifically to register for websites, competitions etc.
Tell your children not to illegally copy copyrighted content such as music, films or software.
Ensure that your children do not have access to your logon account so that they cannot access, alter or delete your files.
Take care to limit children’s access to credit card and bank information. Similarly, ensure they cannot gain access to an online shop or other website where your details are stored.
Set limits on when they can use the computer, and for how long.
Remember that a lot of the above advice also applies to your children’s use of mobile phones, tablets and games consoles.

Further Help and Reporting

If you suspect a paedophile may be grooming or trying to befriend your child – or your child is being stalked or harassed – contact the Child Exploitation and Online Protection Centre (CEOP) or your local Police.

Source: getsafeonline.org

Maybe Baby….? Reasons You Might Not Know You’re Pregnant (Until You’re In Labour!)

A 21 year old British female soldier gave birth while serving on the front line in Afghanistan while not realising she was pregnant – even despite an 8km run as part of her training! Although born almost 5 weeks early, mum and baby are both in a stable condition and are due to be flying home in the next few days.

Yes, if you’ve ever given birth, this is REALLY hard to imagine! Most of us put on at least a couple of stone, and by the end of pregnancy feel very much as though it is dominating our entire being, so it is difficult to imagine how anybody could get to the later stages of pregnancy and not realise it. Surely she felt SOMETHING, right?! Well, in some cases women do not show a bump and continue to have periods for the duration of the pregnancy.

Research conducted in Germany in 2002 found that 25 out of 475 mothers did not realise they were pregnant until they went into labour.

‘How can this be?’ we hear you ask…. As ever, the Oracle that is Nannyjob comes to the rescue with the most common reasons this might happen:

Body weight

The extra pounds associated with pregnancy may not be as noticeable for women who are already overweight. Excess body fat, especially around the stomach area, can help hide the presence of a baby – even from its mother. It’s also important to note that not all pregnant women carry their unborn babies similarly, which influences how large and round a woman’s belly may appear. If baby is growing tucked high under the ribs, or settles in a breach position, it can be much harder to detect pregnancy.

Few side effects

Most pregnancies induce morning sickness, tender breasts, headaches, food cravings, back pain, soreness and weight gain. Since the hormones related to pregnancy affect different women in different ways, it’s not surprising that some experience different pains and sensations, and rarely some experience barely any at all.

Irregular menstrual cycles

Occasionally, pregnant women continue to experience period-like bleeding, which deceives them into thinking they’re not pregnant.

Stress

Stress can negatively affect a woman’s attitude toward pregnancy. Immense pressure and distress can push even the healthiest of women to deny the reality of pregnancy. Stress can affect the regularity of a woman’s menstrual cycle, so a woman who misses a period because she’s pregnant may falsely attribute her irregularity to stress

An inactive baby

Whether the baby rests in such a way that makes its movements hard to detect or it’s simply less active than others babies, movement in the womb — or lack thereof — can shape a woman’s perception of her pregnancy.

Mistaking pregnancy symptoms with another health issue

In some circumstances, a woman might not know she’s pregnant because she believes her pregnancy symptoms are caused by some other health problem. Women with a history of ovarian complications such as tumours or cysts may attribute discomfort or pain to their previous condition.

Source: Discovery Fit & Health

Here at Nannyjob we wish the British soldier and her new baby all the very best, and a safe journey back to their family in the UK.

Paternity Leave – Do Dads Get A Fair Deal?

When it comes to statutory paternity leave, how happy are we as parents? The lines in which specific gender roles once fitted have become less and less defined over time when it comes to work and child rearing, so what was once seen as a bonus amount of time for daddy to spend with his new baby, can now be seen as unfairly short.

The first few weeks of a baby’s life bring about some of the most precious moments we will ever spend with them, as well as probably one of the biggest culture shocks! Most parents would agree that having both of them around at this time to support one another – as well as baby, is hugely important. So with paternity leave at a standard of 2 weeks against the 52 weeks that mums get for maternity leave, do dads get a tough deal from the government?

Research in 2010 showed that new fathers with long enough service at a company were entitled to £124.88 a week for two weeks paternity leave, or 90% of their average weekly wage if that was lower. Assuming a 40 hour working week, this figure came in far below the minimum wage!

It’s a very confusing message to the modern dad… one who is made to believe that ‘co-parenting’ and working spouses each taking equal roles in child care are the done thing. Indeed just 29% of people now believing that parenting is solely a mothers job. Yet fathers are given little or no choice over how much time they can spend away from work and with his child at the beginning of this ‘equal’ new role he and his spouse have taken.

Damion Queva, owner of top dad’s magazine FQ, can see an argument from both fathers and an employers view points:

“There are a lot of very good businesses which already allow paternity leave beyond the statutory minimum. They recognise that a happy employee with a good work life balance will be a loyal employee… At the same time, I think it is reasonable for workers to give plenty of notice, clear their desks before they go off, maybe come in a bit earlier and leave a bit later before their leave starts.

“Times have changed, and so have our priorities, but that applies to employers as well as their employees.”

Are you a Dad who wishes for more paternity leave? Are you a parent who has come up with an innovative way round this problem that you’re willing to share?! Either way, post a comment to the blog or our Facebook page with your thoughts…

Separation Anxiety: When Does It Become A Problem?

The thought of hiring a nanny for the first time can be a daunting one for any parent. Mixed with the added concern about whether or not your child will take well to the nanny (and vice-versa!), the last thing you might consider is whether or not your little one is actually ok with you leaving for work each day – a situation that is probably totally new to them.

You and your child may both experience an element of separation anxiety as and when you return to work, which if course is entirely natural. If, however, you are worried about the level of anxiety your child is experiencing, or if this continues for longer than you think is natural for your child, it may be time to look further into how you and your nanny can help ease the situation.

What is child separation anxiety?

This is a normal part of child development, and can occur from as young as 8months. As the child gets older, it should fade away. Sometimes, however, a child’s fear about separation seems resurface from nowhere after time, or to build up more as time passes. If anxieties are prominent enough to get in the way of school or other activities, this can be a sign that a child has a separation anxiety disorder, and you may want to call on the help of a professional. There are also lots of things that as a parent or a nanny you can do to help.

Some common symptoms of separation anxiety becoming a disorder:

Complaints from the child of feeling physically ill, such as tummy ache or head ache upon separation or just before.
An irrational fear that something terrible may happen to a loved one whilst separated from them.
Nightmares about separation from loved ones.
Fear of going to school or nursery, or a straight refusal of doing so.
Reluctance to go to sleep, for fear of being alone.

Why might my child have a separation anxiety disorder?

Getting to the bottom of the reasons behind a child’s separation anxiety disorder makes you much more likely to help them. The following are common reasons that your child may be experiencing this:

Your anxieties. Parent’s own insecurities and anxieties about separation from the child are felt by your child more than you may think, and it is possible that the child is feeding from them, and learning part of this behaviour from you. Don’t panic if this rings true with you – as soon as you act in a more relaxed way around your child, they should begin to respond.
A change in normal routine – this is likely to be the case if you have recently introduced a nanny and are going back to work.
Any recent stressful situations – this might include moving house, a new sibling being born, falling out with a best friend, or the loss of a beloved pet.

Dealing with child separation anxiety disorder – Tips for parents:

Let your child get to know a new caregiver first. If you need to leave your child with a new nanny who they do not know, give them a chance to get to know each other while you’re still around, so they feel safe.
Create a positive spin. Reassuring your child that mummy and daddy are going away for a little while, but will always be home in a matter of hours, helps to give them something positive to focus on when you leave.
Talk it through. Getting down to your child’s physical level, listening to what they say and explaining that you understand how they are feeling can really help. Just as much as adults, children pick up on when someone is trying to understand them, and are likely to feel comforted by this.
Leave without fuss. Instead of reacting to your child’s anxiety by making a fanfare when you leave the house, kiss them goodbye, tell them that you will be back within a matter of hours and go.
Set boundaries. Make sure your child knows that although you understand how they are feeling and are trying to help, there are also rules that need to be followed.
Give praise. Make sure that any accomplishments, even seemingly small ones like eating all of their dinner, is praised, to help the child feel good about themselves as often as possible.

Dealing with child separation anxiety disorder – Tips for nannies:

Consistency. If you feel that a child you are looking after may have a separation anxiety disorder, try to ease them in to being in your care by continuing as much as possible with any routines they had before. The child is far less likely to feel that things are totally different without mummy or daddy there.
Listen. It’s vital to build a sense of trust up with the child, and making them feel that you want to listen to how they feel and understand them will help them to open up and feel at ease with you.
No distractions. If a child is distressed after a parent has left for the day, explain calmly that you are there to talk to them about their feelings, and give them time to come round, instead of distracting them with something else. The child is more likely to trust you and feel in control of the situation.
Give praise. Just like with parents, children will benefit by feeling a sense of achievement and being praised for any accomplishments.
Stay in control, calm and firm. Make sure the child is aware that you are the boss for the time their parents are away. The separation from their main authority figure is enough for a child with severe separation anxiety, without them feeling as though there is no authority there for them at all.

If you feel that a child is suffering from a case of separation anxiety disorder, and the above tips are not enough to help, it’s best to refer to a GP who can offer further advice.

Summer 2012 Fun Activities With The Kids!

With the days finally drawing out, and the smell of Summer hanging optimistically in the air, comes a wonderful time to think about doing things outdoors with the little ones. However – many of us feel a sensation of mild panic – how will we fill the long Summer days, and make the most of the weeks on end where there is no school or nursery to take over?

Children love being outside when the weather is fine, they can talk louder, jump higher, run faster and get dirtier. So what better excuse to lock away the games consoles and DVDs, and get some good old fashioned colour in their cheeks?! For the good of childminders, nannies and parents alike, here are our top ideas to keep children of mixed age groups occupied in the great outdoors (good old Blighty weather-dependant of course!):

Nature Drawing

If you have some woodland locally, or would prefer to just explore the garden, this is a great opportunity to wander around with sketchpads and take advantage of getting children to draw what they see. Whether it is sketching flowers, worms, trees or simply scribbling with some colour pencils for smaller tots, this is a lovely way of getting their creative juices flowing. This is also a great way to teach children the names of trees and flowers at the same time, and gives them something to stick on the wall once they get back inside.

Host your own back garden Olympics!

What better an activity for this Summer, whilst the professionals are battling it out in London, why not get into the spirit in your own way by setting up an Olympics style tournament for the children? The back garden, or local park are perfect locations, and kids will love choosing what ‘events’ they would like to compete in, be it running races, jumping into a sandpit, throwing bean bags as far as possible or whatever ideas they have! From making signs, leader boards and marking out tracks, there are many hours of fun to be had and you are sure to have stress-free bed-times after all the exercise!

Teddy bears picnic

No matter how many children you are responsible for, a teddy bears picnic is a great way for them to feel that their friends are included – whether they are fellow play mates, or a host of teddy bear friends! Set up beside a big tree for shade, cover picnic tables with gingham table cloths, and have large picnic blankets for the kids and their special friends to sit on. Make sure you send each special teddy his own invitation, and make place name cards for each one. Make some simple teddy ears for each child, by attaching ovals of brown felt to basic headbands, and paint the end of each little nose with black face paint, to make them really feel like one of their fluffy friends. Oh, and don’t forget to sing ‘If you go down to the woods today….’

Cycling

What’s that saying again – once you learn how to ride a bike you never forget?! Well, prove that you haven’t by hiring bikes with the kids and going on a designated route, or simply hitting the park for the morning. If you look after children who are too small to ride, bikes with baby seats are available to hire, and mean that everyone can be involved. www.cyclehireinfo.com offers great information and advice about hiring bikes all over the UK.

Whatever you decide to do, make sure you get out there and enjoy the good weather whilst its here! Why not let us know what you plan to get up to by posting your summer activities onto our Facebook page?

SLEEP FAIRY AND PARENT RESCUE

IS THREE THE MAGIC NUMBER TO GET YOUR BABY TO SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT?

First time parenting is a challenge and the pressure can really get to you. As you have a second, and third, life can become even trickier with more little people to please.

Oxfordshire based Dee Booth, known locally as The Sleep Fairy, is a parent and sleep expert with a track record of settling babies and young children, often in just 3 nights. Her success is based on getting them into a manageable routine, and teaching parents to allow their children to learn to sleep alone. She uses her 15 years experience as a mother, nanny and parent coach to look at the problems and struggles parents are having with sleep and behaviour and how best to resolve it.

Dee said: “The most important thing to consider with babies and sleep is that every child is different and will sleep through the night, peacefully, when they have been allowed to develop the skills to settle themselves throughout the night.

A one-size-fits-all approach not only doesn’t work, but also overwhelms new parents, and often creates an unnecessary feeling of failure. This is impacted by an overload of parenting and sleep books and websites that aren’t written just for ‘your child’, whereas my one-to-one advice is all about your family, and if you follow my advice, it works.

I visit each family in the comfort of their own home, and observe the household, and their current routines and discuss the methods being used. I then work alongside them to find a solution that is right for them. Improvements happen fast and remain in place long after my assistance is over. Sometimes just having an outside perspective and making a few small tweaks is all that is needed”.

Dee’s top 5 sleep tips for parents who have tried everything else and still can’t get their baby to settle and sleep, are:

Establish a good feeding routine during the day – allow a minimum of four hours between feeds / meals
Ensure you set-up a consistent, calm, relaxed bath and bedtime routine for your baby and use this every night
Ensure both parents, and other carers, use the same confident, consistent, firm behaviour not only at bedtimes but also during the day

I do believe that with many sleep issues, simply following my advice means a new routine and pattern of behaviour will be in place after 3 nights”.

Sarah from Surrey:

“Sleep Fairy, and Guardian Angel, she saved my life and my sanity! I was at my wits end when I sought help. My 10 month old wouldn’t sleep at night or during the day, but with the Sleep Fairy’s support, guidance and understanding, Ava is now the perfect sleeper. Thank you Sleep Fairy from all of us!!”

Natalie from Buckinghamshire:

“My second son was difficult to get into a routine and Dee was a TOTAL lifesaver. I didn’t think her 3 night rule would work, but it did! He is now sleeping from 7pm to 7am or later with a 2 hour nap after lunch. The best call I ever made was to Dee!”

Dee also offers phone sessions across the UK and guidance with:

Feeding issues
Tantrums
Toilet training
“the terrible twos”
Colic
Early rising

For more information go to www.sleepfairyparentrescue.co.uk or call 07977 462252 for an informal chat.

New Years Resolutions: A Fresh Start for the Whole Family

The New Year gives us all the opportunity to start afresh. We can leave behind the previous year, and look forward to the one approaching with a clean slate.

Many people make New Years resolutions – but how can these relate to our children and our families in general?

For children, making New Years resolutions can be very beneficial. It is well known that there is little more satisfying in life than setting – and reaching – attainable goals. Children’s New Years resolutions could include learning a martial art, joining a dance troupe or an art class, or even learning to play a musical instrument.

However, it is important not to make children feel under pressure. The modern life of a child is already a fairly stressful one – the last thing children need is to feel as though they must meet their goals perfectly. Rather than rigid goals (like “I will always share with my siblings” or “I will always do my homework on time”), see New Years resolutions as an opportunity for your children to explore exciting new opportunities.

The New Year is also a great time to focus on making positive changes within your family unit. This year, alongside your usual resolutions, why not make some group resolutions as a family? Following are some simple suggestions.

Spend more time together

With today’s busy lifestyle, it is hard to find time to spend together as a family. Quality time is so important – not just for the children, but for the entire family unit. Forget about trying to find the time, because it won’t happen – you have to make time. It can seem impossible sometimes when you’re contending with long working hours, school and other commitments, but it’s important to carve out regular time to spend together. A few hours of dedicated, quality time each week is a must for happy families.

Less screens, more conversation

We live in an age where communicating has never been easier. Email, texting, social networking and phone calls have all but replaced good old face-to-face conversation. Your older children may spend the majority of their time talking to their friends over electronic devices, rather than having real-life chats. Set an example as a family and agree together to make more effort to really talk to one another, and to your own friends and relatives. The art of conversation is at risk of being lost within our digital age – keep it alive in your family.

Be present with one another

The aforementioned technological advances can also have an impact on our time spent together as a family, without even realising it. You may be in the same room as your family, but while you are, how many of you are tapping away at your phones? How many of you are watching a television? When you manage to snatch some valuable quality time with your nearest and dearest, put the screens away and be present in the moment with each other. You don’t want your children’s memories of you to be a face buried in a smartphone.

The Countdown to Christmas – How to Make it Run Smoothly for All

The countdown to Christmas is an exciting time for all of us. Advent, traditionally beginning on the 1^st December, is also a great opportunity for learning about the meaning of Christmas, as well as different cultural takes on the season.

However, the countdown to Christmas can become stressful – children can become over-excited, parents may be anxious about family commitments and financial obligations on the lead up to the big day, and all of this may end up making the lead up to Christmas a fraught experience, rather than the happy and exciting one it should be.

So how can you make the countdown to Christmas a relaxing and enjoyable one – as well as being fun for the kids? This list should be useful for nannies, childminders, babysitters and parents alike.

Shop in advance

Try to do the majority of your Christmas shopping in the months before December. This will leave you far more time to spend enjoying the lead up to the big day, rather than panicking about present buying. Although be sure to stash gifts where curious small people won’t find them! You can also encourage children to make gifts for one another in the lead up to Christmas.

Get creative with the kids

The countdown to Christmas is a great opportunity to get creative with the children. From making Christmas cards for friends and relatives, to using all manner of mediums to create beautiful Christmas decorations to treasure forever, there will never be a better time to indulge your crafty side with the little ones. You don’t need much to make lovely decorations – simple salt dough shapes decorated with cheap acrylic paints and glitter make a lovely addition to the Christmas tree. Christmas baking can also be a wonderful way to spend an hour on a rainy December afternoon – and home made biscuits, mince pies and sweets make great Christmas gifts!

Cook in advance

There are several parts of Christmas dinner that you can pre-prepare a few days in advance in order to make Christmas Day easier – and, of course, to give you more time playing with the children and less time chained to the stove! Stuffing can be pre-prepared and frozen, and you can even pre-peel and chop your potatoes the night before – just make sure you put them in a lidded pan or bucket and cover them in cold water.

Take advantage of local Christmas events

Your town will likely have a whole host of exciting things happening on the lead up to Christmas. Carol services, craft sessions, Christmas fetes and fayres can all be a great opportunity to get the children out of the house to burn off some of that excited energy! Charity tabletop sales are also very common at Christmas time, and give children a chance to choose gifts for their families without too much (if any) adult input.

Homework: For and Against

A couple of weeks ago during an interview on BBC Radio 5 Live with his wife Ruth Lansford, the broadcaster Eamonn Holmes said that he absolutely “hated” homework. Ruth didn’t offer her opinion, but you sensed she didn’t think homework was such a bad thing. The radio presenter laughed along with Eamonn’s rant and pointed out to him that supplementary work at home was thought to be a good thing for children, but his words fell on deaf ears. Eamonn argued that homework put even more pressure on parents. They arrived home from a busy day only to have to sit down and help their kids with homework that more often than not, they were unable to do themselves. Here, his wife Ruth agreed, she was useless at maths and Eamonn couldn’t get his head around geography! Homework, said Eamonn, “should be banned”.

The benefits
So where do you stand on the homework debate? It is said that supplementing school work reinforces what has been learnt during the school day. And how well children perform at homework does, to a large extent, depend on parental support. In households where parents are disinterested in homework or school in general, children are less likely to complete the tasks expected of them or to score very highly. Parental backing is crucial then if the lessons taught at school are to be drilled home at home.

Parents have pressure enough
These days, with more and more parents working, it does become difficult to set aside time for homework. It can feel like an additional chore, to echo Mr Holmes’ remarks. Anne-Marie, mother to Zara, 9 and Rory, 7, says that “It takes me all I can do to get a meal on the table when I get in from work, never mind finding the time to get homework done”. Often children have to be cajoled into doing the work having already spent the day at school. She adds: “We find it another stress: arguing with the kids that it has to be done and arguing with each other [her partner] about whose turn it is to do it”. Her sentiments will resonate with parents in a similar situation. Although you encourage your child to do well at school, homework becomes more work for you at home.

Time out
Others argue that children spend enough time at school; after school is for playing sports or participating in other activities or simply just hanging out with their friends. One parent we spoke to felt that children at least ought to be given a break from homework at weekends. Of course, older children with exams on the horizon will need to do homework to supplement school projects and for revision purposes. But perhaps children of primary school age should be allowed free time once school is out.

For and Against
From a purely academic point of view, it is said that giving primary school children homework can help develop good study habits and foster positive attitudes to schoolwork. It may also improve their academic achievement. The difference in test scores and grades between students who do more homework and those who do less increases as students move up in years. However, as one of the parents we surveyed said “They [children] will know all about the world of work in adulthood. Homework just prolongs the school day”. In conclusion then, if school days are to be the happiest of their lives maybe it’s not wise to pile on the homework!

Pink Princesses and Mucky Boys

Which one are you?
Perhaps you’re one of those parents (is it mostly mums?) who encourage their little girl to dress up as a princess or a fairy; nowadays it’s not unusual to see girls wearing these kinds of costumes, particularly at Birthday parties and other celebrations. Or perhaps you’re a parent who has decided to take a stand of sorts. You’re determined to see to it that your little girl isn’t given a princess dress and you encourage her to muck about and play with trucks as well as dolls; you say you don’t want her becoming too much of a “girlie” girl. This approach to bringing up girls might not influence their behaviour as much as you think. Recent research indicates that traditional stereotypes of what it is to be a girl or a boy are deeply ingrained in our culture.

This article takes a closer look at this study, undertaken in Ireland, and concludes by suggesting how parents and childcarers can help children pursue interests they enjoy regardless of whether they are considered “girls” or “boys” activities. First, let’s look at the lengths a Canadian couple has gone to in order to ensure that their new baby is “free” to behave as s/he wishes, unconstrained by society’s expectations of how s/he ought to be.

A “gender-free” baby
In May this year, a couple from Canada decided not to reveal their newborn’s gender to anyone, including the grandparents. They said they wished for their child, Storm, to choose who and what s/he wanted to be. Their decision, they said, was “a tribute to freedom and choice in place of limitation, a stand up to what the world could become in Storm’s lifetime (a more progressive place?).” A step too far? Many of us probably think so. However, while it does seem far-fetched that a baby could be influenced by gender stereotypes, a recent Irish study indicates that girls and boys have well-established ideas about what is suitable behaviour for their sex and that this starts well before the age of nine “probably in the cradle”.

Gender identity
Traditional stereotypes of boys playing football and girls wearing princess dresses are as pervasive as ever, according to research into Ireland’s nine-year old population. In general, the boys who were interviewed explained how other boys “played football and rugby” while girls “did ballet”. Only boys said they wanted to be chefs and footballers, and only girls wanted to be hairdressers and nurses. Even though the research was carried out in Ireland, we can assume that children in the UK have similar attitudes, given that our cultures are so alike.

And while the study’s authors acknowledge that biology plays a part in influencing girls and boys activities, with boys being physically stronger than girls, “biology does not explain a disposition to like pink and to be able to manage a Hoover [a vacuum cleaner]. It doesn’t explain why boys see school as more for girls and why all boys seem to feel obliged to be fanatical about football.”

Social and cultural influences
Influences such as fashion and television as well as attitudes of their parents/elders are no doubt responsible for children’s concepts of gender. The way in which women and men are portrayed by our consumer culture makes it difficult for parents – and by implication, their children – to avoid stereotyping. When babies are first born they are met by a parade of pink or a barrage of blue. And it continues thus. While we may consider ourselves liberated from antiquated notions of what a woman or a man “is” or “does”, traditional stereotypes still hold sway as the Irish study highlights.

Does it matter?
What are the implications for our children now and in the future? When one considers that figures for the UK as well as Ireland show that girls’ participation rates in sport falls well short of boys’ and that girls outperform boys in education then findings such as these give cause for some concern.

How can we help?
While it is not possible for us as parents and childcarers to change the one-dimensional versions of female and male proffered by our consumer culture, we can do our best not to impose limits on children as to what they can or cannot do. This involves giving your girls the option of playing with toys or participating in activities that are usually associated with boys and vice versa. As the co-director of the Irish study, Prof. Sheila Greene puts it, “When stereotypes are given full rein, children’s choices and their freedom to be the person they want to be can be curtailed.” We may not go so far as to hide the gender of our children, but we can help our children explore every aspect of themselves regardless of gender.