So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, goodbye….All good things must come to an end.
It’s cliché but it’s true, and this time of year is often a time when jobs end. Moving on is part of nannying, children don’t stay young forever and the summer before starting school is often a natural break point, but that doesn’t make leaving your charges behind any less painful.
Work with the parents to prepare your charges for the transition. It’s very distressing for children to suddenly learn that it’s their beloved nanny’s last week with them. You need to give children time to process the change, ask questions and be reassured. Pretending that it isn’t happening will only make it harder in the long run for both you and them. Your charges will pick up on your feelings through your notice period no matter how much you try to hide it.
Give them something to remember you by. Popular leaving gifts are a photo book of all the special moments you’ve shared or a book or set of books with a special message inside but maybe you and your charges share a quirky interest, or you can give them their own version of one of your favourite board games along with a promise that you’ll come and teach them how to play it.
If you’re leaving on good terms then stay in touch. Your charges will have created a strong bond with you and although it’s natural that you move on they will have trouble processing the idea that looking after them was your job and now your job is over. Just because you won’t be seeing them every day doesn’t mean that your relationship with them has to end too.
Show them that you’re sad. If you leave without a backward glance your charges may get the impression that they weren’t that important to you anyway, and that may damage their sense of elf-worth. As a nanny you also invest a lot of time into encouraging children to demonstrate and talk about their emotions, and sadness and grief are healthy and appropriate emotions to show. By verbalising your own feelings and actions you can help them process what they are feeling too.
Last, but certainly not least, allow yourself time to heal. Have a little holiday between leaving one job and starting the next if you can. Don’t expect everything to go perfectly or to have a wonderful bond with your new charge and your employers on the first day. It’s normal to miss your old habits and routines, and to feel a little like you don’t know what you’re doing any more without your funny little companions. Leaving a job is one of the most stressful things for anyone, doubly so when you are as close to your work as a nanny is. Be kind to yourself for a while and let yourself recover from the loss.