Is a Childminder the Right Choice for You?

Like any form of childcare, using a childminder has its upsides and downsides. The needs of working parents are as varied as the children they need to find care for. Just as with parenting in general, when it comes to childcare, there is no one-size-fits-all solution.

In this article, we will try to make an often-difficult decision – what kind of childcare to choose – a little easier by providing a simple list of the pros and cons of using a childminder.

Childminder Pros

It is important, emotionally speaking, for children to forge strong attachments to their caregivers. It is easier for children to form an attachment to one caregiver, rather than several staff members at a nursery or preschool.
Your childminder will be limited in the amount of children she can have in her care at one time, ensuring that she will be able to give the children in their care the attention that they need.
A childminder will often end up costing less than a nursery or preschool.
Many childminders accept the UK’s Early Years Vouchers that give all 3+ year olds 15 free hours of childcare per week.
Childminders will often take newborn babies.
Some will offer to pick-up and drop-off themselves, saving you further time.
Childminders are OFSTED regulated, and by law they must have had a minimum level of training – unlike in some nurseries, where only a percentage of the staff are required to be qualified.
Because the number of children they are caring for is much lower than a nursery or preschool, they are able to offer more flexible, individualised care, taking into consideration any preferences of the parents in discipline styles, for example.
A childminder often becomes like a family friend, and a much-loved figure in the child’s life, remembered well into adulthood.
The home-from-home setting can make it a lot easier for children to settle into being apart from their parents. In addition, being cared for by a childminder makes it easier for sensitive children to develop their social skills, as they will only ever be in a small group of children.

Childminder Cons

Because they are so popular, it can be difficult to find a childminder that is available at the times you need them.
As they work alone, it is a concern of some parents that there is no way of telling what happens behind closed doors. These parents would probably prefer their children to be cared for in a nursery setting.
Some parents prefer the more school-like, structured environment of a nursery or preschool over the more relaxed, home environment of the childminder – this is not a ‘con’ as such, rather a personal choice.

From the perspective of the parents, a childminder often proves to be the most cost-effective, flexible childcare choice. Equally as importantly, many children do better with the individualised care and home-from-home setting that a childminder can provide. Only you know whether a childminder is the right childcare choice for your situation.

Bonfire night safety

With the cost of living on the increase and many of us watching the pennies (and pounds!) you might decide to recreate some of the fun at home with sparklers or by building a small bonfire with older children, maybe even doing some campfire cooking. The most important thing to keep in mind is that fire, and fireworks, are dangerous.

Sparklers are cheap and fun. They give off sparkles as they burn and make pretty patterns, but they can also be very dangerous and definitely shouldn’t be used by children under 5. When using sparklers:

Make sure everyone wears gloves
Hold sparklers well away from you
Keep a bucket of water to put the finished sparklers in
Only light one at a time
Never pass lit sparklers
Keep children more than an arm + sparkler’s width apart – around 6ft or 2m is a good distance
Never allow them to wave sparklers at each other or duel with them

If you want to make a fire, then follow some simple rules and keep it small so it doesn’t get out of control. Remember that if it’s windy you shouldn’t build a fire as the wind could pick up burning sticks and quickly get out of control. If you decide to have a bonfire at home:

Build the fire carefully and make sure it on clear ground away from buildings, vehicles trees, fences and overhead cables. If your garden is too small to build a fire safely then go to a public display.
Make sure all clothing is safe to be around fires – some synthetic materials will melt when in contact with heat
Don’t use any accelerants such as petrol or lighter fuel to make the fire burn faster
Only put wood, cardboard, leaves and and paper on it but keep flyaway materials to a minimum
Have buckets or water or a fire extinguisher nearby
Follow basic fire safety rules and once the fire has died down make sure you dampen the embers to stop it relighting

And finally, we hope you don’t need it but here’s a quick refresher on how to care for a burn:

Cool under cold running water for at least 10 minutes
A burn larger than the size of your hand requires treatment in A&E, as do full thickness burns (these look white or charred) or partial thickness burns to the face, hands, feet, arms or legs (these burns have blisters).
Get medical help for any burn in a child under 5, a pregnant woman, someone over 60, has a pre-existing medical condition or if there are other injuries or the person is going into shock
Don’t pull off anything which is stuck to the burn – if necessary, cut the material around it
Don’t touch the burn or try to pop any blisters
Cover the burn with cling film or put a clear plastic bag over the hand or foot to prevent infection – do not apply ice, creams or greasy substances such as butter

Flexibility: the F word

Flexibility is a buzzword when it comes to childcare. Many parents need someone willing to be a bit flexible with hours to cover unexpected delays and duties to pick up the slack when needed. Most child carers are keen to emphasise their flexibility to maximise their chances of getting a job. But are you using the F-word too much?

Just as our ideas of physical flexibility differ, the types of flexibility different types of childcares often do too. A flexible nursery is a bit like being able to touch your toes with your hands, which is better than only reaching your knees if that’s all another nursery can do for you, but a flexible nanny is more like being able to touch your toes to the back of your head. Even if you don’t touch your toes on a regular basis, it can be reassuring to know that flexibility is there if you need it, just like it can be reassuring to know you have a bit of leeway to cover those unexpected delays.

When choosing childcare options parents should assess how much flexibility they really need – remember needing unusual hours isn’t the same as needing flexible childcare, although you might need someone who is flexible with the hours they’ll agree to work. Different types of childcare are by nature more flexible than others – a nursery has fixed opening and closing times for good reasons, but a childminder has a little more leeway to decide what those are and whether they are willing to make exceptions on an occasional or more regular basis. One flexible childminder might not mind early drop offs or late pickups for core contracted hours, another may mean they will offer an extended hours service but expect this to be agreed in advance. A nanny, especially a live-in nanny, can give even more flexibility, including late notice and overnight care, but this shouldn’t be taken for granted and should always be compensated accordingly.

Child carers promising flexibility in hours provided therefore need to be careful about what they mean. You might be happy to work up to 10 hours a day and although you don’t mind whether those 10 hours are 5am to 3pm or 11am to 9pm you still expect to clock off when those 10 hours are done. Or maybe you’re happy to occasionally start an hour earlier or finish an hour later but are generally available between 8am and 6pm. Perhaps you’re one of the few happy to commit to a set number of hours over the month whenever the parents need you. All of those are being flexible but option 1 is what a shift worker might mean by flexible childcare, option 2 is what someone with a complicated commute prone to delays might mean.

Flexible working is also a two-way street. The quickest way to turn a relationship sour is to demand full flexibility from a childcare provider and never give any back. Giving a little can build up a store of goodwill for the times you need extra help. As one nanny said ‘I absolutely don’t mind doing later days when I am let off early sometimes.

It’s not just working hours that require flexibility – nannies are often asked to be flexible when it comes to jobs around the home. Most nannies will empty a full kitchen bin or put a coffee cup in the dishwasher, and if it’s been a nightmare morning and the breakfast things are left on the side occasionally then that’s okay too. In general, though, nannies don’t expect to act as housekeepers unless it’s part of the job description, so if a nanny says at interview, they’re flexible on duties it’s well worth finding out what that really means.

Just a little flexibility in return goes a long way, allowing a nanny to run some personal errands during the working day occasionally or accepting that a childminder might need to close earlier on occasion can make a relationship a whole lot smoother.

At the end of the day being truly flexible means accepting that sometimes things are going to be a little different.

Keeping your cool

Some days can just be frustrating. Your alarm doesn’t go off, you forgot to fill up the car, there’s no milk when you get to work, the children won’t nap and bicker endlessly, you finish later than planned…..As child carers we don’t have the luxury of a 5 minute break to cool off with a cuppa, we can’t lock ourselves in the loo for a quick cry and we work with people who, by definition, are unreasonable. So how do you keep your cool when everything seems to be falling around you? We asked some of our Nannies for their top tips

Sammie, Nanny, 27

I recently took up yoga and meditation. Now when I’m getting a bit stressed, I trying to do some focused breathing, or sit in a relaxing pose. The little girl I look after tries to copy me and I think it calms her down too so it’s good for when we’re both stressed out.

Emma, Childminder, 32

Whenever I feel myself getting hot and bothered, I throw my plans for the next half an hour out the window and start an activity I enjoy doing. Playdough is therapeutic for me! Then my mindees come and join in and it reminds me why I love working with children.

Hannah, Nanny, 23

The best way to get rid of stress is to smile, make funny faces and funny noises. No-one can stay cross for long. You must laugh instead.

Nina, Nanny, 35

We always put on some music and have a bit of a boogie. Sometimes I need to stomp around a bit, so I pretend it’s dancing, sometimes I just need something to lift my spirits. If all else fails, there’s always Gloria Gaynor.

Eve, Childminder, 38

If I’m cross, I talk about it with the children. I think children are very sensitive and can pick up on your mood easily so it’s important to identify it for them and say what’s happened to make you feel that way. Children can have good suggestions for making you feel better too.

Jess, Nanny, 29

Counting to 10 always works for me. Plus, it’s educational. You just keep counting until you’ve cooled off.

Patricia, Nanny, 54

I’ve learned that you must talk about what made you upset in the first place, so you don’t end up in one of ‘those’ moods with it being one of ‘those’ days. If you feel your boss has been inconsiderate, write it down and chat about it in the evening. If your charges are pushing the boundaries talk to them and to their parents. Talking means you’re not trying to cope on your own and you’re taking steps to resolve the problem.

Lucia, Childminder, 32

Learn to let go. It’s not worth working yourself up because you end up getting unhappier as the day goes on. Holding onto what went wrong only makes more things feel like they’re going wrong. Let it go as soon as it happens.

Debbie, Nanny, 41

Don’t take responsibility for children’s behaviour and emotions. They’re their own person and although they need to learn to control how they feel don’t feel like you’re failing and stress yourself out because they aren’t behaving properly. Your own feelings and actions are the only thing you’re responsible for. Let them be angry if they need to.

Choosing childcare

One of the biggest decisions to do with children is choosing what form of childcare you want to use once you return to work. This decision is governed by a number of factors, including the hours you need, the cost of childcare and availability in your area, but also reflects your personal preferences.

Hours

Some childcare providers e.g. nurseries are only open between fixed times. In order to use this type of chidcare your working hours and commute should fit comfortably within these times. Childminders offer a little more flexibility – although most advertise core hours they are better equipped than nurseries to flex by 15 minutes either way if they so wish, and may be more accommodating of shift patterns. Nannies and nanny shares (were two families jointly employ a nanny to care for children from both families at once) are the most flexible form of childcare because as an employer you can dictate the hours you want and advertise accordingly. Au pairs can provide before and after school wrap around are in a similar way to nannies but are not normally suitable for extended charge of young children, although they are a viable option for nursery wraparound care.

Cost

If you wish to claim any help with childcare costs from the Government you will need to ensure you use registered childcare.

Childcare costs vary between regions but according to the Daycare Trust’s annual childcare costs survey childminders are cheaper on average, followed by nurseries, with nannies being the most expensive for one child. A nanny, however, is a fixed cost per family so can be a good option for families with 2 or more children and offers better flexibility with school holidays etc so if you have older children or planning on having more it may work out cheaper in the long run.

Nanny salaries vary between an average of £600 gross weekly for a live in nanny outside London and the Home Counties and £700 gross weekly for a live out nanny in Central London, working up to 60 hours per week. A less qualified or experienced nanny will earn less than this, and the more experience and qualifications a nanny has, the more they will earn. There will also be additional cost such as employer’s liability insurance if not included in your house insurance, a payroll company, car insurance if the nanny is driving your car, a kitty for activities and any emergency bread and milk shopping and the cost of feeding your nanny, and if they live in, associated bills, which can easily come to £50-100 per week. In a nanny share the cost is likely to be around 60% of employing a nanny by yourself.

An au pair is paid between £70 and £100 a week plus board and lodging for 25-30 hours’ work but as for nannies you will need to factor in around another £50-100 on bills and food, depending on how environmentally aware your au pair is and whether they fit well with your family’s eating pattern or you end up buying additional food, car insurance if you require your au pair to drive, which can be expensive for under-25s holding a non-UK license, a basic mobile phone and inclusion in any family outings and activities.

Personal preferences

Do you want your child to be cared for in a home environment? You’ll need to look at a nanny or childminder.

Do you want your child to be around other children? A nursery, childminder or nanny share would probably suit you best.

Do you want your children to be cared for in a setting with more than one adult? A nursery or a childminder working with an assistant/another childminder is the best option for you.

Do you want your child to be cared for by only one person? A childminder or nanny will ensure your child receives consistent care.

Are you prepared to become an employer? If not, a nanny is not a viable option as nannies cannot be self-employed except in very specific circumstances.

Want to find out more? Look at our past blog posts on ‘why to choose a childminder‘, ‘nursery care to suit your child‘, or ‘is a nanny right for you?‘ or go and search for childcarers in your area.

When parents won’t listen (or change)

As a childcarer you may sometimes find yourself in the situation where you have repeatedly tried to communicate with the parents about an issue and been ignored, or told that the parents will do something only to find they haven’t. At this point you need to make a decision about how important the issue is, to the children and to you, and whether you can work with things are they are.

Any concerns about the children’s safety or well-being must be reported. If you feel a parent’s actions or inaction mount up to abuse or neglect then you have a duty to get in touch with your relevant local authority.

Where it’s not a safeguarding issue, but makes carrying out your job difficult for you then you need to decide what actions you can take without the overt support of the parents, assuming they are happy for you to do so. Children can be quick to notice inconsistencies so acknowledge any differences between what you say and what the parents say, however they are also capable of learning which behaviours are acceptable with which adult and as long as you are consistent with them they will learn (even if it takes a little longer!).

All this, though, can make your job extremely stressful. Finding ways to wind down at the end of the day, or even quietly blow off steam half way through, are vital for your well-being. Feeling alone and unsupported can really sap your morale so share your feelings with your loved ones or friends. Often as nannies we feel we can’t talk to anyone about what goes on in our job but it’s perfectly okay to reveal our feelings and frustrations. As a general rule talking in ‘I’ terms (I feel I…. etc) won’t give anything away and it will help you acknowledge your own emotions instead of bottling them up. Sport can be a great way to relieve frustration, and crafts that occupy your hands such as knitting or card-making can be a good way to calm down and focus on something positive and productive. Creating a time to work through your feelings and set them to rest is another good way to keep your kind clear and preventing stress in your job invading your life. Work on accepting what you can’t change and seeing the positives in the things you can.

Ultimately if you feel the parents are making it impossible for you to continue, or you are unable to destress at least at the end of a working week then it might be time for you to move on. You can change the children but you can’t change the parents, and sometimes accepting that is the hardest thing of all.

Sleep Difficulties with Children – How a Nanny Can Help

Having a young child who won’t or can’t sleep can have a knock-on effect for the entire family.

Sleep problems for babies and young children are becoming more commonplace and routines can be extremely difficult to stick to, especially when you’re not around your child 24/7. That’s where a nanny can step in and help to keep the routine running smoothly so that everyone in the family stays fully rested.

Continue reading “Sleep Difficulties with Children – How a Nanny Can Help”

Premature babies and childcare

A baby born before the 37th week of pregnancy is considered premature. Premature babies born at 35 or 36 weeks may be perfectly healthy but slightly smaller than expect but before that they may have not had time to fully develop in the womb and need to continue developing outside. The lungs are the last organ to develop, which is why mothers at risk of preterm labour are often given steroid injections, so a premature baby may need help breathing in the first weeks and their lungs remain fragile for some time.

A premature baby who had breathing difficulties may be at increased risk of catching certain infections, such as RSV which is common in children under 5. Your doctor is the best person to advise you on the risks to your child but there is a higher chance of catching an illness in a group setting, so a care provider who comes to your home such as a nanny or who cares for a small group of children such as a childminder might be safer in the first years of life. It’s important that care providers are made aware of prematurity as they should take corrected age, rather than actual age, into account when assessing development and may need to be especially careful about hygiene. Some childminders, for example, will accept children with minor illnesses but you may be uncomfortable with that if you child is prone to infections so you will need to come to an agreement.

A good childcare provider will use their knowledge of healthy, term infant and child development to monitor progress bearing the adjusted age in mind. Most childcare courses cover child development in detail and, as premature babies may show some developmental delay, it’s important to bear the need to identify key milestones in mind when choosing a childcare provider, particularly a nanny where no minimum qualification is needed. One thing that can be difficult as a parent of a premature child is the temptation to make comparisons with other children. This is particularly obvious in a nursery setting where many children of the same age are grouped together but it’s important to remember that each child develops individually right from conception and a corrected age rather than actual age is more important up to the age of two.

It can be very difficult to take the decision to leave a child who was premature in childcare. Parents who are used to taking extra care with their baby may find it harder than usual to leave them with someone else, even when it is a professional child carer. You may need a longer settling in or handover period to adjust both baby and parent to the new circumstances.

Although prematurity can have lasting effects many babies are perfectly healthy and show only a slight delay so although it’s important to bear the circumstances surrounding their birth in mind, particularly when assessing development, most need no more care than a baby of their corrected age when entering childcare

Talking tantrums

Parents and childcarers – nannies, childminders, aupairs or nursery staff – are almost all familiar with the tantrums, but there can be differences of opinion on how to deal with them.

As a childcarer it’s difficult to bring up a sensitive subject. Tantrums are an entirely normal phase of development, coming from a child’s desire to show their independence and assert themselves or an inability to communicate, and intellectually parents know that but no-one likes to hear that their child has been ‘misbehaving’.

Parents may not share details of the behaviours with childcarers, perhaps feeling that it’s a reflection on their parenting skills, or perceived lack thereof. Children do often save their worst behaviour for their parents but it is not a sign of weakness to make others aware of facts.

It’s important that neither party shies away from discussing the issue. The best way to deal with tantrums is a consistent approach from everyone involved. That way a child quickly learns what the limits are and that having a paddy isn’t an effective way of getting what they want. Communicating also allows parents and childcarers to share tips and tricks. Parents may know what frustrates their child and be adept at handling it so sharing that information with their child’s carer is vital to help prevent tantrums. Childcarers may be able to offer strategies that have worked with other children or reassure parents that their child is indeed learning to deal with frustration and that the tantrums will soon decrease.

Toddlers especially need to make sense of the world. It’s reassuring for them to have a set of consistent rules and boundaries, consistent positive attention for good behaviour and a consistent response to a tantrum. It’s especially important that everyone is on the same page when it comes to safety. Communicating about expectations and accommodating each other’s practices where possible makes the transition as easy as possible for children and avoids unnecessary tantrums.

Children also need autonomy. Some adults are inclined to say ‘no’ to anything out of the ordinary, even when it’s perfectly possible to accommodate a request, and others will bend over backwards to comply. Obviously in group childcare settings it’s more difficult to deal with individual whims, and it doesn’t do any good to spoil children by giving in to them all the time, but by working together parents and carers can agree what will or won’t be accommodated.

Finally, while it’s important to communicate between adults it’s also important not to let what happens when you aren’t there affect your relationship with a child. Sharing information should help you understand and deal with tantrums, but it needs to be done sensitively and with respect.

How to Become a Childminder

Why Become a Childminder?

Becoming a childminder has been a popular career choice in recent years. Many stay-at-home parents choose to become registered childminders because it gives them the flexibility of being able to work from home, during hours that suit, and still being able to look after their own children.

Some people believe that childminding is just a pocket-money job for stay at home parents, but this is not the case. Childminders are professional childcare providers who have undergone a registration process, which ensures that they are suitable for caring for other peoples’ children.

Registration

In order to become a registered childminder, you will need to attend a pre-registration session at which you will receive all the information you’ll need, plus an application pack and information about the Early Years Foundation Stage. To find out when and where the next pre-registration session will be, contact your local authority. They will also be able to provide information on the availability of childminder start-up grants that may be available to you. Like any new business, there is an initial investment.
If you decide to go ahead with your application to be a registered childminder, you will need to submit your application along with your registration fee.
Next, you will need to have a CRB check – Ofsted will advise you on how to go about this. Additionally, anybody over the age of 16 who is regularly in your home will need to have a CRB check. You will also need to be registered with the Independent Safeguarding Authority (ISA)
You will then be subject to an inspection by Ofsted, where you will need to prove that you meet the requirements of the Early Years Foundation Stage.
Before you are registered, you will have to attend a paediatric first aid course. Within 6 months of your registration, you will also be required to complete a childcare course.

Your Home

Contrary to what you might believe, you don’t need a big house and garden to be a childminder. You don’t need to own your home either. However, your home should be safe and suitable for children of all ages. You will need to invest in safety gates in order to stop small children attempting to climb stairs unassisted, and you may need to get some cupboard locks for your kitchen cupboards.

You will need to have toys and books for the children but these needn’t cost the earth – excellent quality toys and books can be picked up second hand for very good prices at car boot sales, charity shops and in local classifieds.

An outside space is a bonus, and some parents may prefer their children to have the option of playing outside whilst with their childminder, but if you don’t have a garden there’s no need to worry. The first priority of most parents is not the garden space of their children’s prospective childminder – their ability to lovingly care for their children is far more important.